LDR trouble... Advice?

[Sweptaway]

Hello, I was wanting to ask a question anon-like, but I can't lol I'm really shy about this, since me and my boyfriend only been together for a short while. But I would like some advice for my LDR.

I live in Georgia(U.S) and he lives in Kelowna(Canada)and our time difference is 3hours(I'm ahead, he's behind), we didn't have much of an issue until he started college. He barely has time to do anything due to college and work, which is putting a strain on us because when we message each other, it's super late where I'm at and it's usually short and sweet. Our messages went from constant to every-so-now-and-then... He also said he hates messaging me, knowing that I could possibly be asleep.
Just the other day, he messaged me a "Goodmorning", and it's been the first time in awhile since he's done that, so I said goodmorning back. But we didn't make any conversation due to him/me being busy.

I sent him a long message explaining how I felt, and that he's not putting enough effort and that I believe that we should start sending letters to each other as another form of communication. He then told me that he doesn't have much time and feels that I shouldn't chain myself to him. I told him that I don't mind, I just want to know if he's still there or not.
I really care about him and I believe I'm falling for him... He told me he loved me a few weeks ago and I told him I can't give him a response so soon, but awhile after that, I recorded myself saying that I love him, because I feel like I really do... I hate the fact that someone like him is so far away, I hate the fact that I have to fall for someone who possibly might be messing with me, I hate the fact that I have to feel this way and I absolutely hate the fact that I'm doubting we'll last because of this. I'm hating this so much, but yet I don't want this to end because of distance and time differences.

I just want to know how he feels about me every second of the day, every time he has left to squeeze in a couple of words/messages to me. I want to tell him how much I care about him but I cannot put it in words, I want him to know how much I care about him, I want to know how much he cares about me, but we're both still up in the air... He told me there were things he wanted to say to me, but ended up deleting because he was afraid it'll scare me off. I told him I don't care about that, I accept all information I could possibly get so I can understand him better... It's odd on how much this man has impacted on me in just almost 3-months. We never seen each other in person, only skyped once, but messaged each other a lot.

I just need help, I'm not used to relationships like this, and I never felt so "right" about someone before. I just need another's opinion whom has actually been through an LDR. I just need someone to point me in the right direction, because I don't know which way to go.

[Unigirl]

Hi!
I went from living with my SO to going to University so I kind of understand his sudden annoying lack of time, but from my opinion when the IM's aren't the same anymore it's time to think of new communication methods. You are very right about the letter writing, it's great to read back a letter he wrote when he is too busy to talk to you! Me and my SO love Harry Potter so I wrote my last few letters on parchment in green ink with the Hogwarts wax seal because it reminds him that we share an interest and shows that I pay attention to what he enjoys. (Though he still hasn't picked up on my hint that some flowers might be nice!) Anything small that shows that you are thinking of them, something they can keep, will bring back any emotion lost in the IM's when your SO see's it.
The best thing you can focus on is when you will get to see each other or even have a few hours to skype! I keep telling myself that after this year my SO might move to where I go University and we can live together again, and between those times we make plans, set dates! This Christmas has been a big one in our books for a while, and now we are looking to plan something for the summer like a festival etc. but in person things need to be set when you are 100% with your relationship else it could be a waste of money.
I've been in a LDR that hasn't worked in the past because we were far too young but all you can do is keep trying! I won't stop trying with my SO until we discover we wont ever live together and start a family.. because that is a reason to give up, even if it does feel right. Until you have a reason, and unless he is holding you back from living you're life as you would normally , I would try.

[Unigirl]

Feel free to PM me.

[differentcountries]

How about once a week arrange to have a skype date? Or even make videos on skype and send them, if your time difference makes it difficult to have a set time live.

[Cristiana]

Ugh, time difference sucks. I have some friends online who I rarely talk with because of this.
I could suggest you to send him emails, messages, even letters if you want, because he can always check his phone or pc and find out you thought about him and wrote to him! If you really want to do something, you do it without expecting something in return. I learned this with my SO. If you want to make him happy by these little things, then do it but dont expect anything from him; he will have his way to prove to you he thinks about you!

And then also what differentcountries says could be an idea.

[AnnMarie Green]

Living with LDR and college is difficult.. My husband is still in college in Pa., and it does consume an enormous amount of time.. And YES, at times, I become BOW (Bitch on Wheels) and become quite demanding..He is too close to the end of his degree to transfer, (transferring causes loss of credits and other issues) but I tell you, sometimes I do feel close to the bottom of the list of priorities.. He continues to remind me that his education is crucial to our security, so maybe further along in your relationship it will work out this way.. Good luck to you, and blessings!!