not really sure if this goes here..

[uk2usa]

..but i'm so stressed out. since i've come back from america i've missed my SO desperately. and since i've been back, we played games for a few nights and since then we have had phonecalls at night-time. we fall asleep on the phone to one another, which is cute. apart from that we don't facetime, or do things together much. i talk to his best friend more than him (not inappropiately, but we talk about general things like music, films, philosophies) and it made me realise how little my SO and i have proper discussions together. when i was in america, we had a great time and at one point we were preparing dinner together for his family, discussing our future goals while peeling potatoes. (so adult i know :P)
i'm not really sure what the point of this thread is .. i feel rubbish this week. i've lost my job, having to give up my pet and still trying to figure out how i can save £600 for flights to go back and see him (he can help me out a bit but not entirely), aswell as juggling other bills. i had a telephone interview before and just fell to pieces.. which is unlike me. i'm under a lot of stress and i really need my SO's support but he just plays xbox. he tries to be there for me but we end up getting frustrated with one another and arguing about silly things. it goes in circles.
right now i have some money saved towards flights but his birthdays coming up. if i spend some of that saved money on presents, i'll beat myself up as "It could have been money for flights." literally any money i have goes in my savings account, i've sold a lot of stuff aswell to put towards going back to the USA.
has anyone had financial difficulties while trying to maintain their LDR? and if so how have you managed with it?

[differentcountries]

It sounds like you have post visit blues, combined with a lot of financial frustration.

Most people have financial challenges with their LDRs. I for one have neve spent that much money on gifts for SO, I have always gotten him something but I don't think he would have liked it if he got something expensive but I didn't come to visit him! But I always spend a little money sending him cards and small gifts, just to remind him that I care. The rest, like for you, goes into us actually seeing each other.

I usually think far ahead. What can I save money on and so on. I find cheap tickets. I combine visits with easter vacation and summer vacation to kill two birds with one stone.

Have you tried finding online "questions for lovers" to ask each other? It has been very helpful for us, to get to know one another and making Skype fun.

[uk2usa]

thank you for your reply i guess you're right about the price of gifts, it is to remind them that you care. i try and think far ahead, ideally i want these flights booked by the end of february if not sooner. does that make me impulsive and selfish? am i wrong to want the flight paid and sorted so i can concentrate on other bills?
i haven't, but i shall look for those questions

[bubblehits]

When it comes to gifts for my SO, I tend to get together a small package of chocolate that they don't get over there in the states and send him that, he enjoys it more than an expensive gift.

When I visited my SO last, it was amazing, he was so cuddly and talkative but when we Skype he is more reserved and quiet. He plays his games and all I get is one word answers. He's never romantic or any of that stuff but when I've had a bad day he tries as best he can.

After this next visit I'm going to be struggling for money, I'm resigning from my job before I go away (with the plan of finding full time work on my return to the UK) so right now I'm doing whatever I can to save up while still giving my parents rent and paying my bills.

I always want to buy my plane tickets the minute we've decided what dates are appropriate for everyone so i don't think you're impulsive or selfish at all. But in my opinion, I would get bills paid first and then plan for the tickets. My first set of tickets I bought about a month before I actually went away and the price wasn't that different from what it had been earlier in the year. It just sucks that plane tickets are expensive in general :/

Good luck in getting everything saved up.

[uk2usa]

When it comes to gifts for my SO, I tend to get together a small package of chocolate that they don't get over there in the states and send him that, he enjoys it more than an expensive gift.

When I visited my SO last, it was amazing, he was so cuddly and talkative but when we Skype he is more reserved and quiet. He plays his games and all I get is one word answers. He's never romantic or any of that stuff but when I've had a bad day he tries as best he can.

After this next visit I'm going to be struggling for money, I'm resigning from my job before I go away (with the plan of finding full time work on my return to the UK) so right now I'm doing whatever I can to save up while still giving my parents rent and paying my bills.

I always want to buy my plane tickets the minute we've decided what dates are appropriate for everyone so i don't think you're impulsive or selfish at all. But in my opinion, I would get bills paid first and then plan for the tickets. My first set of tickets I bought about a month before I actually went away and the price wasn't that different from what it had been earlier in the year. It just sucks that plane tickets are expensive in general :/

Good luck in getting everything saved up.

Do we have the same boyfriend!? Lol mine is the same with short answers, but when we talk on the phone he is his usual sweet self.

It's so hard to find a decent job - I was gutted to come home and lose mine. I've decided when I get money some will go to a bill and some towards flights. I'm scared of them going up a lot as it'll be for summertime.

[bubblehits]

I'm going away june-july and my flights just cost me £660.

Just save up where ever you can, you could get a jar and whenever you have loose change put it in there. it all adds up at the end of the day. Finding a decent job is awful, companies always want people with experience or a particular qualification. I'm willing to learn anything if they gave me the training.

[Unicorn26]

[QUOTE=bubblehits;383093]I'm going away june-july and my flights just cost me £660.

How do you find your flights? I wanted to visit my SO in July and couldn't find flights under £1000....

[bubblehits]

How do you find your flights? I wanted to visit my SO in July and couldn't find flights under £1000....

I buy my tickets directly through British Airways, I did that on my first visit because I knew I could trust the website and when I bought my tickets I was impressed with the price. But to be honest it probably depends on the airport's you flight out from and into and if you have any stops along the way, (although I've never tested the theory).

But yeah, British Airways.

[Unicorn26]

Thank you so much. I will have to look into this a little harder! So frustrating the price of flights....

[Colourfuldreamsx]

July is always the most expensive month for flights due to school holidays, I'm booking my flights for June with British Airways and the lowest price I've found so far is £680 through Expedia but then on the BA website the same flight costs nearly £900!!!
Try save as and when you can, get your bills paid as you don't want to end up in debt with them but save what you can for flights!

Good Luck!

[Hollandia]

July is always the most expensive month for flights due to school holidays, I'm booking my flights for June with British Airways and the lowest price I've found so far is £680 through Expedia but then on the BA website the same flight costs nearly £900!!!
Try save as and when you can, get your bills paid as you don't want to end up in debt with them but save what you can for flights!

Good Luck!

Did you try Kayak.com?

Also remember to clear your cookies or sites can raise prices while searching.

[uk2usa]

£300 saved! <3

[merlinkitty]

I've started shopping Skiplagged for airfare. Granted I've yet to purchase anything yet *soon!!* I've found stuff running around $1000 (~£600-700). I've got a gamer SO too. I just kind of accept he's going to be out for a while and will message me when he's had his fill. The time difference just blows though lol

The only thing I didn't really see discussed was how you're having difficulties getting into in depth conversations with him. I'm sure there are things you'd like to know his opinion on. I'm assuming you two are connected by some sort of messaging program as well. Just shoot him questions! See what he says. Or ask him on the phone late night conversations sometimes lend themselves to the existential lol listening to your money saving schemes I think just convinced me I can shut off my cable. I will live without my Outlander show when it comes out in April lol And hang in there. Just put your head down and work towards your goal. You're determined even if you're down right now. You'll get there

[crazycarrie06]

I use skyscanner.com for flights. They not only compare airlines but also pretty much every travel website out there (like Orbitz) in every language. I always find super cheap flights. Found a flight for my SO to Athens in July for 900$
Skiplagged is great for domestic flights - but I found skyscanner beat their findings by 1-200$ for international filights

Anyway - question - why can't he come visit you? Knowing the financial trouble you're having.