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Is it happening too fast?

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    Is it happening too fast?

    So, first I'll just make clear I am not in a LDR, per se, but I am in a "commitment" with my long distance friend; we're just going with the flow of things, and waiting for the right, and more possible, time.

    In saying that, we're incredibly close, and I suppose in a sense already act like a couple. However, I'm just after other people's opinion on if there's such a thing as too fast in situations like this.

    I've only known my friend for three months. But we connected instantly, when we met in December online. We spoke every single day, almost all day, for a month until we both started realising that there was something more there in regards to how we felt about each other. We confessed our feelings, in hopes it wouldn't affect the friendship. And it absolutely didn't, in fact it seemed to just make our connection stronger. A week or so later, we started to speak about visiting each other in the distant future. However, not long after the topic was brought up, we set a date to meet...and it was only in just four weeks time. My sister was already going to the state he lives in, and so I spontaneously decided to pay my way and include myself on the trip. Which was already something I'd never done, and thought I'd never do, but I was committed and ready despite it happening so quickly. I met my friend in person on the 11th of February to the 19th of February. After our time together, when I got back home, we both realised our feelings were a lot more intense than we'd originally thought. That's when we both became saddened by the fact that these strong feelings were now going to create some issues, the distance being one of them, our jobs and University being another. We got passed that however, by talking about it in depth, plus with advice from here and family members, and we now feel better about our situation. We continue to talk every single day, some days it can be almost all day, through to the early morning. We've never run out of things to talk about, there's never been awkward silences or boredom. Conversations are just constantly following, a balance of humourous banter to in-depth and expressive conversation. Which has been and is lovely, don't get me wrong; I'm just worried that, having only known each other for three months, we're still in that emotional high, exciting stage of things, and everything has been in high speed from the very start, that it may start to burn out if we continue to do everything at a fast pace. We don't do it on purpose, everything has just been falling into place so fast on its own. But, should we somehow try to slow it down, or should we just let things happen as they already are? Is there such a thing as too fast?

    This is probably a silly thing to question and worry about, but I'm someone who just over-thinks everything, and getting other people's advice tends to help put things in perspective; to lay it out in a less complicated way.

    Thank you.

    #2
    There is only such a thing as hasty decitions for the future. Being happy and high after 3 months, most of it just friendhip/dating and not a relationship, is the most normal thing in the world.
    I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
    - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



    "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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      #3
      The time period in which people enter relationships will vary and differ depending on circumstances and the individuals involved. I've known my SO a year, and we've been together 3 months now after he revealed he was in love with me and had been for a long time. Only you can decide, with your potential partner, when the time is right and whether you feel as if you can take your commitment to the next level. Good luck!

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        #4
        SO and I have taken a lot longer because we weren't open like you two for the first year and it's worked for us. Do what works for you, what you're comfortable with. Enjoy to ride
        "Sometimes you just have to let art flow over you."

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