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    How often should we Visit

    I was just wondering how often should we visit we trying to see each other every 30 days, but I'm finding it hard to wait that long... Also, I don't want to over step.... I just spent 6 days with him (last week) and Easter is coming up and I will have 4 days off I don't want to ask if I can come but would love for him to ask me to come... how can I get him to ask because He has said in the past he feels like he is taking advantage of me. but it's so much easier for me to go than for him to come see me.... I have no ties here he has 3 kids...

    #2
    You can visit as often as you like and can afford. That being said, I visit SO once a month and I think it is enoughbecause I also have to work and see to my life here.

    What do you mean if you can come, do you worry about his kids? Why should you not come?
    I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
    - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



    "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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      #3
      The best thing to do is talk to him about it. Reassure him that he's not taking advantage of you, and that you don't mind going to him since it's easier. Visits don't necessarily have to be 50/50 if it's much more feasible for one party to visit more than the other. If you want to spend Easter with him, tell him. How often you see each other is entirely up to you and your s/o. Figure out what's comfortable for the both of you, and then go from there

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        #4
        Yes I'm worried about the kids...they are getting very attached to me as I'm to them the little one is 8 and cries every time I leave... It takes my SO a couple of days to settle her down and I don't want it to be a big thing every time I leave... also, it scared me if he keeps having trouble with her that he will break it off with me.... he has made the comment that he's glad the the (mother) does not come around b/c all she does is upset the kids and it take him forever to settle them down.... (don't want him to feel like that with me)

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          #5
          I am sure he can see the difference between you and his ex, and that he is happy his little girl likes you so much.
          I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
          - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



          "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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            #6
            Actually, the more you visit the more the kids will be used to you leaving and they won't get so riled up. Especially if they know they're going to get to see you again soon. I agree that if you want to see him for Easter, just tell him. Let him know that he won't be taking advantage of you and you figure that it's much easier for you to go to him, this way he doesn't have to worry about the kids.

            I do all the visiting to my SO and most of the time I just tell him I'm coming down.

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              #7
              I think if you can more often, you should. My bf and I now live states apart. It's been 7 months and we've only seen each other 2x. I can't visit him again at all this year due to being a single mom, I don't have PTO or vacation time through my employment, and it's very expensive to travel :-\ So, definitely take advantage of being able to visit often if you can :-)

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