How did you know he/she was the one you wanted to marry?

[oinkpig329]

Did you just know, or did you suspect and had to give it time to grow on you? Would you change anything about how your relationship has played out?

[Sarah96]

I'm still fairly young and not married, but I definitely know I want to marry my boyfriend some day. We talked about having a future together pretty early on, but that was the honeymoon phase where we couldn't get enough of each other and enjoyed the fantasizing about our futures. I think now that we're nearing 2 years together we've talked about it more in a serious way. After I finish college we're going to see what works out for us we'll see when we get married but it took some time. I've loved him for quite a while but it took a little bit of time to realize that he's the only person I would want to marry.

[snow]

I knew we were going to get married the day he kissed my crooked tooth and told me he would never want me to change anything about me. It was the way he treated me when we first met, the fact he never cared about me being overweight and how supportive he was of every little thing I ever wanted to achieve.

I always wondered if I would get married to my ex-boyfriend and I had always hoped we would, but I never knew. With my husband, I knew, it just felt right

[Unconditional]

I knew he was the one when after he came back from a month of training he called me before he called his mother- that is huge in my book. Also, everything with him feels right a future with him, it makes my entire being happy beyond belief.

I have to say no, I wouldn't change a single thing. Every good time, every obstacle has brought us to where we are today. We have a stronger relationship because of everything.

[differentcountries]

With my husband, I knew I had to be either in or out. I had gone around telling people he would make a great boyfriend, it just never entered my mind that it would be to me before we got together. We were friends (cd) for 4-5 years before starting to date. I knew when he told me he was in love with me that I had to marry him or loose him. I loved him more than anything as a friend, and was immensly attracted to him, which is a good basis. We would have married much sooner, had it not been for my wedding anxiety /the bad breakup from my ex.

Yep, I married my ex, who was also my first serious girlfriend. We used to fight a lot but I figured I could deal. We both could have behaved better in the breakup. Alas, but we were only 20 when we we started dating and 23 when we married. Everybody said we were a little young but we felt so mature... At least we divorced soon enough, freeing me to marry my husband.

Actually, one of the first things SO said about us and any future (at that point we had know each other max two-three weeks, and dated in person 2-3 days) was that he wanted to marry me and grow old with me. I did not know weather to break up over something so spontanious and stupid, or just be immensely happy that he felt our strong connection the way I did, but I landed upon happy.... Later we discussed it and I have said I don't hold him to it, but in a way I do, and I feel he does too, it is just he is looking for me for practical ways of making it happen. I call it "married or something similar". I would rather not divorce my husband for us to stay together (even if only on paper), it is also up to my husband. I think it would be nice to have some ceremony at some point, weather we live together or become married. He acted very romantic with me at the wedding we attended in fall, more than hinting that he would like to marry me and I feel it really speaks to me so that I would like to. I guess I am lucky in that sense that he has never loved anyone but me, so the way he experience love is very new and fresh. I like his family... which is good even though I married my husband despite not liking his family all that much.

[p_b82]

I nearly married both my ex's for very different reasons, but the love felt for them was very different.

I was more 'in love' with my recent ex, and wanted to marry her because I wanted to be able to move to her, and while that wasn't the reason to marry, the fact I couldn't come and go at will and see her whenever was something I wanted to rectify. I did want to spend the rest of my life with her; every time i woke I thought of her, and the same throughout the day and when I went to sleep. But the relationship was somewhat of an emotional rollercoaster; and with hindsight I do believe it is better that it didn't work out actually.

My previous ex, was more about a good solid stable relationship, with the foundation of great friendship, and without being crude a very healthy sex life. the reason I wanted to marry her was for the commitment aspects to show her, and the world we would be together until death. but I never proposed because she would not stop asking to be allowed to sleep with other people - and I told her, I will not marry you, while you ask this of me. Eventually I got so fed up I gave her the ultimatum to choose me or an open relationship with some-one else, she finally chose the latter - 2 years & a house purchase later. Had she made the commitment to me to not keep asking - knowing how I felt about it, we would likely be married now for 4 years!

In both cases I would have done things differently, my previous ex, I would have left sooner; and my recent ex I would have backed off and slowed things down... but for me it is not worth dwelling too much on the past, other than to take note of the lessons learnt...

[Dwessie]

I have not married Tam yet but everyone knows we both fully intend for it to happen :3
We're actually recently engaged, just a lot of people don't know it cause I'm making the world's smallest deal out of it cause I made such a big deal about it with my ex that it felt more like an incredible status symbol I could use to brag to my friends. (We'll make it Well Known when she comes down here)

How I knew she was the one for me is everything already felt right but like, you nevr know how nice it is when ONE PERSON out there takes you seriously and treats you like royalty even when you're a screaming sobbing bitch because your life is in chaos. Even my own family (Who I love) can't just bounce back after I yell at them about things nobody can control for like four hours, and Tam cheers me up and reminds me that everything being crazy isn't (always) my fault.

Somehow it has taken us both this long to find anybody ever who knows how to cheer each other up so well. We're super amazing when we're happy, and we're still super amazing when we're both being huge whiny turds about things because of a bad week. I guess you know you found someone really good when you can just be the pure uncensored you around them. Everyone else we ever dated (And again with our families) we never felt like being 100% us because we felt too judged.

...I feel like my explanation got away from me I wish I was better at words.

[Cristiana]

How I knew she was the one for me is everything already felt right but like, you nevr know how nice it is when ONE PERSON out there takes you seriously and treats you like royalty even when you're a screaming sobbing bitch because your life is in chaos. Even my own family (Who I love) can't just bounce back after I yell at them about things nobody can control for like four hours, and Tam cheers me up and reminds me that everything being crazy isn't (always) my fault.

I guess you know you found someone really good when you can just be the pure uncensored you around them.

THIS! YES!! I agree 100% with you. And I also know my SO is the one for the same reason! I can be myself, my moody-weird-difficult-self, and he will be there still.

Once, when we were talking over the phone while I cried because of the same old problems of mine, I told him "You must love me so much to stand all these depressing teenager bullshit." He laughed and said "I agree".

He's there when nobody is. He listens when nobody wants to. He cares when nobody does. He finds some time for me when everybody would rather stand me up. He's always sincere when everybody's fake or hypocritical. He laughs with me at my flaws when everybody just point them out. I'll let him be himself and he'll let me be myself.
These are only few of the reasons I know he's the one!

[R&R]

This will be the 4th (yes, 4th) marriage for both of us. Each of my marriages taught me things that I really want in a relationship and partner and things that I really don't and that I won't compromise on. Though there was love in those relationships, I learned how much love isn't what it's all about.

I knew the first time Rob and I dated that he was someone I could see spending my life with. When we got back together and after we met in person, I knew for sure. He isn't perfect, I'm not perfect and neither is our relationship. We grew up so vastly different and our adult lives have been polar opposite. He challenges me, he tries my patience, he makes me laugh, he makes me cry, he listens to me, we have disagreements, he is protective, he is romantic, he doesn't put up with bullshit, he loves my kids like his own, he is his own person and let's me be mine but we are also a whole couple, he is the person I want to still go on adventures with, he is who I trust, he is who I can see caring for in our old age and he is who loves me and who I love beyond measure. I think we both know enough now what we truly want out of life and a partner and this will finally be the successful marriage we both want.

[SailorRei]

I guess you know when you decide to go long distance. Or at least that was a case with me. I have never believed in LDR, like how could people do it?! But then I met him, and we spent 5 month living together in the same city. And after it was time for us to go back to our homes, I just knew that I can't let it go. So what's the point of going through LDR, all that heartbreaking moments and goodbyes and uncertainty, if you don't know if this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with? Why would you spent your time on skype and chats and invest in that person, if you're not sure if his the one?
But that's just how it is with me. If I had any doubts about if he's right for me, I would leave and spare him and myself the disappointment later.

[lyonsgirl]

I knew we would get married when he took me to the children's museum for the first time and he still stuck around after I got overly excited about the Barbie exhibit. That was our first and a half date. That was 4 years and 3 months ago.

[MissingMyDutchLove]

I guess you know when you decide to go long distance. Or at least that was a case with me. I have never believed in LDR, like how could people do it?! But then I met him, and we spent 5 month living together in the same city. And after it was time for us to go back to our homes, I just knew that I can't let it go. So what's the point of going through LDR, all that heartbreaking moments and goodbyes and uncertainty, if you don't know if this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with? Why would you spent your time on skype and chats and invest in that person, if you're not sure if his the one?
But that's just how it is with me. If I had any doubts about if he's right for me, I would leave and spare him and myself the disappointment later.

Totally agree with this! It was very similar with me as well. If he weren't the one there is no way in hell I'd put up with seeing him only every seven months.

[Jaz707]

Wow. I guess I didn't know I had it so good. I've been indecisive back and forth because of all the "small details", but at the same time they seem so huge. Not married; but we've talked about it a lot.

[whatruckus]

I knew we would get married when he took me to the children's museum for the first time and he still stuck around after I got overly excited about the Barbie exhibit. That was our first and a half date. That was 4 years and 3 months ago.

This made me laugh. Lol.

[lucybelle]

When he ordered appetizers, meals, desserts and a full bottle of wine at dinner. I thought "yeah, this is someone I can hang with!!!"