Confused

[memyj97]

Me and my SO live quite a ways away, about 27,000 miles. We text constantly and Skype when we can, usually at night. Anyways, he was telling me the other night that he thinks we wanted to do try a certain substance for the first time. I'm not going to go too into detail, I just need advice on how to handle the situation. I don't like to be the kind of person that controls your morals or you in general. And when he told me this I kind of freaked a little and told him I wasn't comfortable with him doing it. It could be a dangerous thing to try, emotionally and physically. He said he wanted to try it simply to feel the euphoria. He's a very deep thinker and can get kind of depressed and I hate not being able to help him because I'm so far away. And If anything serious happened, what would I do? Sorry for rambling a little, I would just like to know if you guys think I should let him make his own decisions or should I stop him?
Thank you!

[Miasmata]

If you think he could have some legitimate mental illness, he should absolutely NOT selfmedicate with drugs of any kind. The big issue here, sadly, is that you can't force him to do this or that. Even if that was a good option, you aren't close enough to do that. But please, urge him to call a hotline or speak to a professional. Treating your woes with alcohol, drugs, etc. leads down a very dangerous path. If you don't know 110% what you're doing, you can't guarantee that the substances are of decent quality, and you aren't in an absolutely stable mental condition, drugs should be a no-go. This isn't about whether drugs are okay or not, this is about him not being in the right mental condition to handle it.

[ronjaandbirk]

honestly I think umless you both had good talks about him about possibly being depressed and getting professional help, suggesting getting medical advice as a reaction to him wanting to experiment with drugs will get you nowhere. He could end up just feeling judged gor being curious about something bad in the majority of peoples eyes, something that people have alot if assumptions about especially in combination with mental health.

The reason I say this is that in my honest opinion, being curious about drugs doesnt mean at. all. that you have a mental health problem. Neither does being a deep thinker So I guess I'm saying is it your personal bias against any kind if drug that makes you worry about his mental well being, or genuinely that he is depressed? In that case I would second Miasmata.

But if you havent had talks about that yet I think I would just make him aware that it makes you really uncomfortable and explain to him why and try not to judge him. At the very least ask him to be very. very. sure to be with a trustworthy person that has alot if experience with said substance and that will take care if him during his experience. In the end you can't force him to do ir not to do anything.

[Redheart14]

If you think he could have some legitimate mental illness, he should absolutely NOT selfmedicate with drugs of any kind. The big issue here, sadly, is that you can't force him to do this or that. Even if that was a good option, you aren't close enough to do that. But please, urge him to call a hotline or speak to a professional. Treating your woes with alcohol, drugs, etc. leads down a very dangerous path. If you don't know 110% what you're doing, you can't guarantee that the substances are of decent quality, and you aren't in an absolutely stable mental condition, drugs should be a no-go. This isn't about whether drugs are okay or not, this is about him not being in the right mental condition to handle it.

I agree try get him to speak to a hotline

[Miasmata]

At the very least ask him to be very. very. sure to be with a trustworthy person that has alot if experience with said substance and that will take care if him during his experience. In the end you can't force him to do ir not to do anything.

This is a very important point. If he's going to do it at all, he's gotta do it with company around who are prepared to take care of him and to call a doctor if things go awry.