Going out with someone (not SO)

[Happy_Girl]

So i met a guy and he wants to meet me and visit my country which is near to his. He asked if i can make time for him and bring him around the places or meet me if im going to visit his country. Is it weird or inappropriate to go out with another guy friend alone? I just want to know if it is something stupid or whatever to ask before talking about this with my SO. Because if you all think it is inappropriate i will just reject him.

[Redheart14]

Have you met him before?

[Kapwned]

1. Does anything about this guy tell you that he may think that you doing this with/for him may be of any indication that you like him or will sleep with him? And if so, would he be bold enough to make moves as opposed to talk about it first?

2. Do you know him well enough to be alone with him?

There's nothing wrong with it in and of itself, I'd just be concerned about those two things. Your SO shouldn't be a concern, it should be your safety. Just make sure you talk to your SO about it, don't be vague, and keep them well informed since if jealousy is not an issue, the concern for your safety may be. If you are absolutely sure that you can trust this guy and know he will not put you in any uncomfortable situations then go for it.

[Happy_Girl]

Have you met him before?

nope. we met online and seen pictures of him.

1. Does anything about this guy tell you that he may think that you doing this with/for him may be of any indication that you like him or will sleep with him? And if so, would he be bold enough to make moves as opposed to talk about it first?

2. Do you know him well enough to be alone with him?

There's nothing wrong with it in and of itself, I'd just be concerned about those two things. Your SO shouldn't be a concern, it should be your safety. Just make sure you talk to your SO about it, don't be vague, and keep them well informed since if jealousy is not an issue, the concern for your safety may be. If you are absolutely sure that you can trust this guy and know he will not put you in any uncomfortable situations then go for it.

He knew i have a boyfriend and we made it clear that we are just friends. No feelings no sleeping together. He just wants to meet and be real friends instead of virtual friends( just online friends) and visit the place he's always wanted to.

i think i can trust him mostly, just feeling a bit insecure because this is my first time meeting someone online. And i dont want others to misunderstand us when they know im going out with this guy. because we have no mutual feelings

[hmrambling]

Do you have plenty of other face to face friends? Do you have people there that you hang out with, get coffee with, go eat with?

[sweetshay]

While some might not find it to be a big deal, others may actually get jealous of this sort of thing and lose trust that you're even considering it. Put yourself in your SO's shoes first - would this bother you if he did it? Ultimately you just need to ask your SO about it, tell him who the person is and why they want to visit to see whether your SO is comfortable with it or not.

[MissButterfly]

I have some online friends that I met in an MMO and I've visited one of them this past winter break, and planning on visiting the other at the end of summer. They're both guys, one of them is single so 'potentially risky' I guess, but my SO knows both of them and has/had absolutely no issues with it. It's not just about whether you are comfortable with it though, have you talked to your SO about it? If you would like to meet him, having a boyfriend isn't a reason not to! It may be a really cool opportunity. Have you been friends long? Does it feel right? Don't let our judgment decide for you, it's your own choice.

[Happy_Girl]

Thank you for the replies. I think i'll talk to my SO to see how it goes. After all what he thinks about this is important.

[Kapwned]

Thank you for the replies. I think i'll talk to my SO to see how it goes. After all what he thinks about this is important.

You could also bring a friend or sibling along. For safety. It's generally suggested to not be alone with someone you're just meeting in person for the first time. Plus a third person could be a fun addition.

[hmrambling]

Thank you for the replies. I think i'll talk to my SO to see how it goes. After all what he thinks about this is important.

No, what he thinks is not the most important. What I think of myself is most important. What you think of yourself is most important. Does your SO know you've been chatting with this guy online? I asked a series of questions in my other post, all of which went unanswered: Do you have plenty of other face to face friends? Do you have people there that you hang out with, get coffee with, go eat with?

The purpose of those questions was to look at if you have face to face friends that you spend time with. What are your motives for talking to this man online? Have you examined your own motives, and have you been honest with your SO about talking to this man online? Ultimately it is you who has to live with you, and your SO's opinion is not the most important.

[Happy_Girl]

No, what he thinks is not the most important. What I think of myself is most important. What you think of yourself is most important. Does your SO know you've been chatting with this guy online? I asked a series of questions in my other post, all of which went unanswered: Do you have plenty of other face to face friends? Do you have people there that you hang out with, get coffee with, go eat with?

The purpose of those questions was to look at if you have face to face friends that you spend time with. What are your motives for talking to this man online? Have you examined your own motives, and have you been honest with your SO about talking to this man online? Ultimately it is you who has to live with you, and your SO's opinion is not the most important.

yea i do have friends there. I'm thinking to ask some friends to go with me.
i just want to make friends from different places and he knows we talk online. I talked about this with my SO and hes totally okay with it. I think i should respect him and put him in priority than the people i talk online. Since my SO and i havent not closed our distance yet i think i should let him know about this in case of trust problem thingy. but hes fine with it

[Ejoriah]

I don't think there is anything wrong with making friends online. I have a few online friends myself, although I haven't made new friends since meeting my SO. But they know of my SO and I make sure to mention them to him as well - for instance, I'll relate a joke one of them made, or an anecdote.

Your SO is fine with you hanging out with another friend one on one, that's good! When I do that I tend to send my SO little texts here and there, just so he knows I'm not forgetting about him.