Help me to get my soul mate :(

[darkshines]

hi guys.I am together with my boyfriend since almost one year. we met in interpals i would never imagine and actually laugh and don't believe the love by online but we both fell in love suddenly and can't stop to love each other even we tried to deny it. And days after days,after skypes ,long nights together we just reailzed that we found our soul mate and the love of our lives.i really can't think a day without him.I am Turkish ,he is French . we boyh are 20 years old. But there are many barriers between us. Our family doesn't accept this because we have diffrent culture ,we met in in internet etc.. During his year we always iamgined this summer together ,we saved money ,we explained about us and wanted help nut at the end i can only go to france with a tour with my mother but for only days .. because my family doesn't allow to me go alone . i can't go without their permissin because i need visa.. and for him his family thinks that istanbul is dangerous.. even the good comments about istanbul and french conculate says istanbul is really safe she doesn't want because it's a muslim country..so our all hopes are gone for this summer and next years too. we think about to move australia together after we finish our studies and just live in peace and create a family together .but there are at least 5 years to can do this . and thinking that i can't even see him during these years is just killing me . and this is really so hard . I found my half and i don't want to loose him because of what ppeople thinks,differences between our country and miles .. because nothing is more important than him. we have no support .. i am writing here because we need people who can understand us and maybe any suggestions from you .. thank you

[Kapwned]

There's only so much you can do, honestly.

Your information says you're 20, and in all countries that I know of that is adulthood and you are open to act independently. I understand you may still be dependent on your parents financially and living with your family (plus they are family) so their opinion matters a lot, and there is a lot they can do to stop you. You have to look at what is preventing you two from coming together and tackle it one by one.

1. You need money, therefore you should be working and making money.
2. Your families are mostly preventing you two from meeting. They do not approve, and they probably will not approve until you've shown some ability to be independent, this might require that you move out on your own or have a serious talk with them about how you are an adult and you should be able to make important life decisions on your own. This is going to be the hardest to achieve.
3. You need a Visa, which you should be able to get on your own. I assume you do not need your parents to get a visa unless they are withholding important documents that you need. In which case, I know in the US, it is illegal for your parents to do that after a certain age.

Other than that it might be cultural differences and ideas that clash on what you should and shouldn't do. In the US we're taught to be assertive and be our own adult and to do all we must in order to achieve our goals, so if our parents get in our way we are encouraged to make our own path. Family is family, but at the end of the day it is your life you are trying to lead, not theirs.

No long distance relationship is easy. Many of them require years of waiting, and only a few are lucky enough to close the distance as soon as they want to. Try to not focus on the years it might take, instead just focus on the moment, take it a step at a time, make little goals that you know will help bring you two together. Do research on the best possible solution for you two. You said you want to move to Australia. That is easier said than done. You two will need to find work and obtain work visas in order to move to Australia.

[differentcountries]

In our case, even though SO lives on his own, for his visitor visa application to Norway he had to state who all of his family is, and he had trouble understanding the document. We had to gonger through it many times to get it right and to prepare for the visa interview. For the tourist visa we did the year before they asked about income and property (we did visitor visa next time because he does not earn /own enough to get a tourist visa, and it meant nothing that he is also a studentx they didn't even bring it up in the rejection papers). Perhaps what she means is that she will not acceive visa on her own due to Frensh visa rules regarding Turkish citizens but perhaps she will as a dependant of her mother? In that case, the family meddling is very understandable.

[darkshines]

Yes i am student so i need my father's bank acoounts ,papers from job etc . but hed doesn'ts support me to go each year so it will be really hard to go to france again . And for him. His family is racist and they are really scared about turkey ..Maybe because of media but omg istanbul is really safe even safer than paris ( accorduing to french people whov visited istanbul) . but they don't beilive . so he willlnever can come turkey . maybe when he has his own flat but this is many years later ..And can't having him many years just makes me so done . i don't want to loose him because of distance in years and i really need him ..And our lessons will be so hard next year and with thid sadness i dont know if we can success ,i really don't want our studies becomes longer and can have us so late ..

[differentcountries]

Is there a chance for you guys to meet up in Greece or Bulgaria? Perhaps easier for you to get a visa there.

[Dziubka]

Are both of you students?

As a student it's probably easier than at any other point in your life to move abroad for some time. You could go on Erasmus, either to each other's countries or to a third country together or you could look into the EVS - European Voluntary Service and take a break from uni for a few months.
You could also look into different youth projects. They are often subsidized and make travelling really cheap.

[darkshines]

We tought about erasmus but no but i should search the other thinks yes thank yo so much. It would be perfect we do a third country but them seem hard to do too