Am i crazy or am i just paranoid?

[krxssy]

Hey, so my SO and i have been doing long distance for about 5 months now, previously before that we were together for a year. Anyway, i've been sort of getting insecure/paranoid about how things are with us... I'm afraid maybe he's getting sick of it or he doesnt wanna be with me anymore? idk tho it might just be me being paranoid anyway. so we're the type of couple that talks everyday, and like once in a while i would get sad about us and tell him about it. He's the type who's very zen live in the now type of shit so yeah i dont think he ever gets sad / jealous / worried about me. although he doesnt have a reason to, i know most guys would tho. anyway, these past few days, ive been starting fights, and he always makes me feel better at the end of it all but then recently, i moved to another city for a new school and just moved into my new place i wanted to skype him about it to show him my new place but he was just like "sure i'll just have breakfast, maybe you can send me photos first" so i did but he never skyped after that. then my next issue was we were sorta sexting then he just flat out stopped replying to me... which is weird cause he never does that. next thing i know is i see him on face book and he was liking my stuff on instagram so after that i was kinda pissed like wtf right? then the next day he messages me saying oh baby i was so horny last night i couldnt stop thinking about you blablabla so i asked him.. lol why didnt u reply to me then.. then he was just like i didnt know what to say after that. lol and im just like.......... if you were horny last night... how could u not know what to say when u usually do... ugh its just frustrating like is he lying to me about that? and then apparently that same day, he got the package that i sent him i asked him to send me photos wearing the stuff i sent him but he was just like "soon" (he broke his phone weeks before and is just using a spare but he could skype me about it right?) i dont wanna ask him to because i wanna see what he'll do.. idk im just worried/ paranoid that maybe he might be cheating on me cause hes acting weird? someone tell me if this is strange or im just over thinking... i just miss him so much someone tell me if im over reacting please?? or what should i do... anything will help... thanks

[sasad]

This is really hard to read as you skip around and really don't use punctuation.
You say you have been starting fights. Perhaps he is being over cautious so you don't keep getting upset with him?

[krxssy]

Sorry about that, i was typing really fast haha Will try to edit it but anyway.. They aren't really fights, it happened like twice in a span of a month. We don't usually fight and i was just expressing how I was feeling (worried if he was getting too crazy there or something)

[krxssy]

This is really hard to read as you skip around and really don't use punctuation.
You say you have been starting fights. Perhaps he is being over cautious so you don't keep getting upset with him?

Sorry about that, i was typing really fast haha Will try to edit it but anyway.. They aren't really fights, it happened like twice in a span of a month. We don't usually fight and i was just expressing how I was feeling (worried if he was getting too crazy there or something)

[differentcountries]

There are some questions that are left unanswered in your text:
1. How come you/him have/should have time to Skype before/after his breakfast? Are you guys not going to school or working?
2. Do you have any network where you live now?
3. The sexting sounds like all misunderstanding to break honest. Goes to show why it in bad to rely on justeres text.
4. Why are you ordering him to wear the stuff you sent him? Are they clothes?

[sasad]

What Different said...
There are so many unanswered questions so it is hard to figure all this out. There are so many outside factors that could be causing a lot of this.
I am going back to your original where you said "anyway, these past few days, ive been starting fights, and he always makes me feel better at the end of it all"
You may be demanding a lot from him at this point in time. Arguments, expecting him to skype right away, wearing clothes you sent NOW. etc....

[differentcountries]

The problem with this type of behaviour is that you risk getting the exact opposite situation of what you want. You risk him concluding that it is too much and want to back out. It seems like you are focused only on you wanting his attention but do not ask yourself if he also needs something from you. Everybody needs something. Your may wish for him to be there during your change, but he may need from you a sign that says you can sometimes be ok by yourself. Is there something positive going on where you are?then you could send him a picture of that. Probably works much better than him contacting you just over the spare phone. Ask him how his day is, or tell him that you care about something that is important to him. Like, his broken phone , or that he can keep some of his zen.

I am not saying it is easy to by insecure, far from it. I am in a difficult situation with my own SO right now, half the time I think he is breaking up with me or like I am not important. But I try to remember that unless he did something mean to me, I have to take care of things, too. Sometimes it is noones fault but is because of time, distance etc.

If you don't mind me asking... Do you eat a good breakfast (I noticed you were eager to Skype when he was eating)? Sometimes when I feel sad and confused it helps a bit to take extra care of how I eat sleep, eat, work out etc., I mean the sadness doesn't go away but I feel more grounded if I take care of that, and need SO less.

[twentynine11]

My first thought as I was reading your post was that you probably just miss him and you're having a hard time adjusting to the distance. My SO and I have been together for 3 years now, 2 of those years have been long distance. It wasn't until this year that I really faced my insecurity and paranoia head on. I speak from my experience so you are welcome to dismiss anything that does not apply to you. I used to, and there are still times that I do now, take everything that he said and did personally. If he didn't text me or call me for one night, I would automatically assume the worse.
He was in Vegas with some friends for the weekend recently, I sent him pictures like you mentioned in your post one night. He replied with a simple text so I sent him more. I didn't hear anything from him for the rest of the night. I took it to heart and made it personal. Long story short, I took everything he said and did personally for the remainder of his vacation. Needless to say, he was in Vegas with friends that he never gets to see. He deserved to have fun and relax for the weekend. It was only three days. I should have realized that he was at a concert with his friends and thousands of other people. That probably wasn't the best time to try to send him pictures for "his eyes only".
What I'm saying is...
1) Don't question his every move. A lot of times, we tend to think too much into situations. My brother in law told me this once, "Worry is sin and if you worry enough you can create the environment conducive to set the wheels in motion for worry to become reality with your actions/reactions through emotion."
Overthinking situations with your SO can set the wheels in motion to create the very thing that you are "worried" about to actually become a reality. I hope that makes sense.
2) As sasad mentioned, he could have a guard up because he doesn't want a fight to break out. Your SO expects you to react in certain ways because of your behavior lately (starting fights, over analyzing). My advice... be unpredictable. Surprise him with kindness and understanding. This may take biting your tongue and dealing with situations on your own. Just remember, not everything is a problem. Some things can be worked out with changing your thought process and resisting the creation of an argument.
3) You mentioned that he didn't reply to you, but he had time to get on fbook and IG to "like" your posts. Try looking at it this way... He was looking at your posts. If he wasn't thinking about you, he wouldn't have taken the time to do that. Yes, you would have rather him take that time to reply to you. My point is that we have preferences in situations and when those aren't met, we tend to have emotions and behaviors that make things worse. Realize that when what you prefer doesn't happen, that is okay.
4) LDRs tend to offer a lot of added stress to an individual and the relationship itself. Do not give stress/anxiety that power. Do not let stress/anxiety win you.

You aren't crazy, you just have to look at things through a different perspective and change your thought process. Otherwise, anxiety will warp your mind.