Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

New to LFAD - introduce myself and my situation :-)

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    New to LFAD - introduce myself and my situation :-)

    My name is Jess :-) im 24 years old and I'm from Queensland in Australia and I thought I'd join to hopefully get some insight and advice!
    I'm fairly new to the whole long distance relationship thing.
    I've been seeing my Boyfriend for 4 months now. He's a truck driver and is based in a town about 800km away. We first met when he was travelling through my town and his truck broke down. I stopped to help him (as I am a mechanic) and we got chatting and well the rest is history! I've had a few failed relationships, 3 to be exact, including an engagement to a man who I really thought was the one. I will admit, thanks to these relationships, I have some serious trust issues but I'm really working hard to conquer them!
    Now my current relationship and boyfriend is amazing! His work would often bring him through my town on a almost weekly basis which was amazing! But now, he has started a new job which is local to his home. I have been searching like crazy for a job down his way so I can relocate, which we both agree on. But, times are tough and work is proving hard to find! It's really driving me crazy that I can't just pack up and go, but due to certain commitments I need to ensure I find full time work before moving. It's really hard and he says we will figure something out, but it's really taking its toll on my emotions which in turn is bringing him down. I don't want this as he always tells me one of the reasons he fell for me was my amazing smile and my positive attitude (which both seem to be fading really fast!)
    I'd absolutely love some outside, non biased input please and maybe some helpful ideas and hints to help me through till I can get myself a job and make the move!

    #2
    Hi Jess! Nice to see a fellow Queenslander on here!! This forum has been an amazing support to me, I hope it is to you too.

    Comment


      #3
      Thank you! I am so stuck on what to do and it's hard to fill all my alone time in! I'm so glad it has helped you and I hope it can help me too :-)

      Comment


        #4
        What's the rush? You've only been together a very short time, it might be a horrible idea to relocate from a place where you have steady employment already. In an LDR, sometimes people focus so much of their time and energy into closing the distance that they forget to enjoy their relationship they have now. LD is hardly the end of the world, and you aren't so far away that frequent visits are impossible. My best advice to you, as someone quite experienced in LD, is to be patient, and see where your relationship goes. Your guy is right, it will work itself out, but give it about 6 months to make very sure your relationship has long term potential before completely turning your life upside down. If this relationship turns into something with potential, a short few months and a few km's isn't going to hurt it. Good luck.
        Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. ~Albert Einstein

        Comment


          #5
          Hi and welcome here

          I hope before closing the distance you have the uppertunity to visit him in his home town and see for yourself how his life is there, meet up with his family and friends etc. Moon makes valid points about the job and the relationship, I just want to add that you also need a social life where you move, so if you use this time to visit his side you begin building network there as well. which, given your trust issues, I will advice you to do an not just throw yourself into things there. No matter how amazing your boyfriend is, you also need something beside him to thrive in your new life. Best wishes for a hopefully enjoyable change from cd to ld, be it soon or later
          I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
          - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



          "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

          Comment


            #6
            Sorry guys I should have stated that I plan to move closer to his location but not to live with him! A move to somewhere different was on the cards for me before we met, I just wasn't sure where! So I have been applying for jobs at places within a 200km radius of where he is. I will still have my job, own place etc.

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by Elle13 View Post
              Thank you! I am so stuck on what to do and it's hard to fill all my alone time in! I'm so glad it has helped you and I hope it can help me too :-)
              This is by far the thing that was hardest for me when we were just starting out LD. It truly helps to stay busy. Is there a hobby you always wanted to try but never have? You could also pick up a class in whatever your interests are or just simply make more of an effort to do something that you already love. For me, I have a slight thrill every time we go LD again when I realized that means more time for reading! I never get to when he's around! I also spend a ton of time with my friends and family. A good support system is key! Good luck and I hope you find your LD rhythm soon!

              Comment

              Working...
              X