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How far is "long distance"?

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    How far is "long distance"?

    My bf lives 75 miles away. He says we're not in a long distance relationship but I feel like we are. I see him maybe once a week. It's definitely different than living in the same town. Everything is more of a hassle. Can't just drop by his house. So what do you guys think constitutes a 'long distance relationship'? How can it be defined?

    Thanks!

    #2
    Well 75 miles and once a week is nothing compared to my 1000+ miles and once every 4-5 months but it's still long distance I guess

    Everyone's in a different situations x)

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      #3
      it's all objective, I guess it's how you feel, I'd say that seeing each other once a week is still not at easy as seeing each other on a daily basis, and there are aspects of what all of us long distancers are used to with that. I just know that I'd be really happy if my man only lived 75 miles away and I saw him once a week. I consider me moving to Shanghai while he's in Hangzhou as a temporary closing of the distance, but I'm still only going to get to see him maybe once every two weeks and he's still an hour train ride away, but he's not going to be 7500 miles away and a 20 hour plane ride complete with visa fees etc. lol, so I mean it's all in perspective.


      我爱我的男朋友我。现在我们一起。

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        #4
        yeah i basically consider any relationship where it isn't easily accessible to see the other person is somewhat long distance. obviously there are different levels, like my boyfriend and i live a thousand miles away and have to take a plane to see eachother. a lot different than yours, but i would still consider you two somewhat long distance
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          #5
          What the others said - while it's not as long distance as mine, 75 miles is pretty far, and it is totally different than being able to see each other all the time in the same town.


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            #6
            At our closest, we were 85 miles apart. Which is nothing compared to our long distances (5000 miles, and 2100 miles), so I considered it close distance. But I think if you're not seeing each other frequently and it's a bit of a trip to do so, you can call it long-distance.

            If you look for it, I've got a sneaking suspicion...love actually is all around

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              #7
              I think it's more convenience of travel than actual miles. I had a friend who lived an hour away for 5 years, which in the end seems not that long a distance, but money's tight so I couldn't afford the gas to see her but once every three months, if that, and she couldn't ever drive up to me because she didn't have a car and then when she got one, she could never get off work or afford gas AND rent. Someone could live 45 miles away but if life and money is keeping you from seeing each other frequently then it can be considered a long distance relationship. But that's my opinion.

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                #8
                I think there's varying degrees of long distance relationships, but I don't think you can measure them purely in miles. If it feels like an LDR then it probably is one, I'd consider myself to be in an LDR if I was you. It's not as if he lives down the road and you can go visit him whenever, it has to be planned in advance, that's usually a tell-tale sign of an LDR in my opinion.
                In a relationship with


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                  #9
                  I think that a Long Distance Relationship is not so much one that is focused on a specific milage apart, but rather one of convenience of being together. That being said, an LDR is different things to different people. I think I can speak for many of the folks in my position who are thousands of miles away from their SO that probably think that 75 miles and a (relatively) short drive is nothing compared to waiting in an airport for an hours long plane ride.

                  It seems like the only one who can answer this question is you.

                  Andy got it much better than I just did:
                  I think there's varying degrees of long distance relationships, but I don't think you can measure them purely in miles. If it feels like an LDR then it probably is one, I'd consider myself to be in an LDR if I was you. It's not as if he lives down the road and you can go visit him whenever, it has to be planned in advance, that's usually a tell-tale sign of an LDR in my opinion.

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                    #10
                    I think that you are in a LDR Just being apart is long distance!

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                      #11
                      Hm not sure about it, but seems to me if, to visit them, you can't go back to sleep in your own bed that night, they are long distance.

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                        #12
                        Any distance that poses an obstacle in your relationship would be my definition
                        First date: 12.27.09
                        Started the distance: 6.10.10
                        Finished the distance: 8.17.12

                        J & C

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                          #13
                          if im being completely honest, well depending on the situation...if I lived anywhere from 2 hours or shorter away from Amanda, I would see her basically every single day. Anything longer (within reason) probably atleast 2-3 times a week. Amanda and I live 14 hours away from each other, which is really hard, but I guess you can consider yourself long distance, each situation is different
                          My <3 is in Connecticut

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                            #14
                            When my gf was 5 miles away I usually only got to see her once a week, now she's 3 hours away (and on her way down here, I hope I get to see her!!) I see her whenever she comes down for the weekend which is about every other week until she gets a job.
                            Met: 1.20.09 (At School)
                            Starting Dating: 5.22.09
                            Been an LDR since: 8.17.10 (3 hours distance)
                            Last Time I saw my SO: 10.02.10
                            Next time I will see my SO: 10.14.10

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                              #15
                              I love the replies I got about this. I agree that any relationship where you have to plan in advance to see eachother and where you can't go back home and go to sleep in your own bed is long distance. From the very first night we were together, it has always had to be over night.

                              Thanks for the comments!

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