I think my father's in denial about us
Hey guys. So, last week I brought up the subject that I'm planning on moving to Norway to live with my S/O sometime within the next 3-5 years. My mom didn't have much to say about it, and my dad seemed fine with it. He just pretty much gave me the whole talk about jobs, living situation, money and those kinds of things. He seemed to be fine with it. He talked about how it's obvious that the relationship my S/O and I have seems like it's the real deal, since I've been loyal with being over 3,000 miles between us.
However, this morning he asked me "You do realize if you move to Norway, you're probably going to spend the rest of your life there, right?" I nodded and said "Yes, I understand that." He asked me another question along the lines if I was only going to come back for his and mom's funerals. I said "Of course not!" At first he took it as I wouldn't even come to the funerals, but I explained how I plan to call almost every day, and I plan to come back to the USA and visit as often as I can. Then he gave me a talk how I "don't know" my S/O. Well, I know him, but I don't know him. But, here's the thing. I do know my S/O. We've been in a relationship for almost two years, and so far, we've lived together for a total of three weeks. Two weeks in August 2014, and one week in March of 2015. We've told each other our secrets. We know what each other's flaws and short comings are, we know each other's past, what we deal with on a day-to-day basis, family troubles, and illnesses. We have told and tell each other pretty much everything. No secrets and no lies.
Now, before anyone might say "Well, three weeks in total of being face to face isn't a lot of time." I understand that. Before the two of us actually make the decision to live together, we plan to spend December-January for Christmas and the New Year together. Almost a month together, as I plan to leave for Norway either December 20th or the 22nd, depending on my own schedule. Just to see how things would truly work out. Dividing up the house work, and so on. And, if that works out well, we plan to spend 3 months, the maximum amount of time you can stay in Norway without a visa, together. So my S/O and I do have a plan. I'm not going to pack my bags and leave next week to spend the rest of my life in Norway.
I understand where my father's coming from. No parent wants to let go of their children, especially when one of them is planning on moving to a country that's 3,000 miles across the ocean. But I'm 19 years old, and I can't live off of my parents forever. I love my parents with all my heart, but I also love my S/O. One of us has to make that sacrifice of moving to another country, and it's best for both of us for me to be in Norway, due to finances and mental health. We'll see how things work out between us in that total of four months. Of course I'm going to miss my parents. They've done nothing but support and love me for my entire life. I hope they won't see this as a stab in the back, because as I said I will keep in contact with them. I'm prepared to do what I need to for my love.
However, this morning he asked me "You do realize if you move to Norway, you're probably going to spend the rest of your life there, right?" I nodded and said "Yes, I understand that." He asked me another question along the lines if I was only going to come back for his and mom's funerals. I said "Of course not!" At first he took it as I wouldn't even come to the funerals, but I explained how I plan to call almost every day, and I plan to come back to the USA and visit as often as I can. Then he gave me a talk how I "don't know" my S/O. Well, I know him, but I don't know him. But, here's the thing. I do know my S/O. We've been in a relationship for almost two years, and so far, we've lived together for a total of three weeks. Two weeks in August 2014, and one week in March of 2015. We've told each other our secrets. We know what each other's flaws and short comings are, we know each other's past, what we deal with on a day-to-day basis, family troubles, and illnesses. We have told and tell each other pretty much everything. No secrets and no lies.
Now, before anyone might say "Well, three weeks in total of being face to face isn't a lot of time." I understand that. Before the two of us actually make the decision to live together, we plan to spend December-January for Christmas and the New Year together. Almost a month together, as I plan to leave for Norway either December 20th or the 22nd, depending on my own schedule. Just to see how things would truly work out. Dividing up the house work, and so on. And, if that works out well, we plan to spend 3 months, the maximum amount of time you can stay in Norway without a visa, together. So my S/O and I do have a plan. I'm not going to pack my bags and leave next week to spend the rest of my life in Norway.
I understand where my father's coming from. No parent wants to let go of their children, especially when one of them is planning on moving to a country that's 3,000 miles across the ocean. But I'm 19 years old, and I can't live off of my parents forever. I love my parents with all my heart, but I also love my S/O. One of us has to make that sacrifice of moving to another country, and it's best for both of us for me to be in Norway, due to finances and mental health. We'll see how things work out between us in that total of four months. Of course I'm going to miss my parents. They've done nothing but support and love me for my entire life. I hope they won't see this as a stab in the back, because as I said I will keep in contact with them. I'm prepared to do what I need to for my love.
And welcome to Norway!
And, thank you for welcoming me!
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