Please help :(

[lilygreeneyes]

I have been MIA from this site for the past several weeks, ever since my SO moved away 3 wks ago. I spent time around this site before he left, trying to get myself together emotionally before it actually happened and checking out all the neat ideas. But ever since, I haven't been able to bring myself back here. I've been scared to come back here. Being here, on this site, is like just another harsh reminder that he's actually moved. Just bringing myself to write this feels heartbreaking all over again. Instead I've spent the last 3 weeks in a horrible depression.

Ever since his move, my SO and I haven't been able to get back on a good page. He's been moving around a lot from one couch to another as he stays with coworkers while he searches for a new apartment. He works late into the night as he tries to learn his new job. So even when he gets home from work, he's not in his own place where he could spend time on the phone without being rude to other people who are nice enough to let him crash on their couch. Meanwhile we just haven't connected or adjusted to this distance. He was supposed to be going on a business trip that would bring him a few hours from me and I planned to drive to meet him. I was hoping that would help give us time to talk and reconnect. But now his boss has changed his mind and is sending my SO to a different city this weekend, no where near me. I'm starting to feel like I can't deal with this. I feel so empty. I've tried to talk to him about this and he keeps saying give it time, give it time. I just really feel so empty. I can't describe it. I feel nothing, just...blank.

Someone please tell me if this is normal or I'm just being a huge wuss or maybe it just means I'm not cut out for a LDR. I'm really at a loss right now. I can't seem to figure out how to get back to the place where I was madly in love with my SO of 2.5 years. Please help

[Zephii]

Really, it does take time, and support. *Hugs* can you write to each other? Would he write back? It really really helps. And with snail mail he can do it anywhere without disrupting the people he's staying with.

It's hard, but you can do it. We all can.

[Karringtyn]

Hang in there. Love is worth anything in the long run. Stick around here too...the support is wonderful.

[agentholli]

*hugs* I am so sorry...LDR's are hard, but love is worth it! It will take time to adjust, but you will make it!

[leonina]

The first month is definitely the hardest (but the others are all pretty darn hard too). Just keep your chin up until he can get settled into his apartment and things will hopefully get a lot smoother at that point. And maybe if the distance isn't too far you should start planning a trip? I needed to see him that first month apart because it was so hard.

[paulawriteslove]

'm starting to feel like I can't deal with this. I feel so empty. I've tried to talk to him about this and he keeps saying give it time, give it time.

I agree with your SO. You just need to give it time. Everything is hard at first because you have to change routines and get a new one started. But believe me, everything will fall into place and will be worth it in the end. *hugs*

[pytsip]

The first month or so is always hard, especially when you're used to being around that person day in and day out. I know that for the first few weeks that my boyfriend left I was in a crazy funk but what really helped were friends. The first month was just a long drawn out "girls night" and believe it or not it did wonders. I still was sad that I didn't get to talk to him a lot (he was in the same boat as your SO where for the first month or so he was going from couch to hostel to couch to hostel so internet connection wasn't reliable for him in any means.) My suggestion to you is get out, meet up with some friends, go for dinner, go to a movie, take one of your girl friends out on a "date", one of my friends who's hubby is in the military did this for me the first week that my guy was gone and it was the sweetest thing ever and really helped me out. You're not weird, it's extremely stressful being torn away from the person you love, but life goes on and while you can love him and work on the communication and the relationship, you can't be so depressed that you don't go on with life.