Just found out....

[Swederica]

I have never intended to take the responsiblilty away from her. And the only thing i meant with the leadership role is trying to help her organize this mess. There's a lot to do even if the child is put up for adoption. One of the things i intended to help her the most with is breaking the news to her parents.
I'm sorry if from what i'm saying i sound like i'm taking the baby but so is not the case. It never has been. My intention is to help her. At the same time i can't stand too much critizism against her either.

Well that can be prevented with making clear that my gf's sister is not free to run off and do whatever she wants. She is the mother to that child, so she will act like that. I hope for her grandparents to help with money and childcare assistance and knowledge. So basically them adopting and treating that child as it were just a sibling to the others. That's how the whole sibling thing got in there. Not that the child will be the sibling but that it will be like a sibling.
Sorry if i sound like i'm totally switching opinions or plans or whatever. But i have been in better conditions when i've gotten on here to post.
I understand that and that's a noble intention of you.

[Caitlin2009]

Once again. We are speaking about a girl who were dating 15-year olds at 9. Who partied like crazy at 10. Who was a drugdealer at 11. Who went to jail at 12 and now apparently is pregnant at 13.
The supposed father i've met and he's very nice actually. He's 16 but to his defense, my SO's sister lied about her age. And honestly if i were to meet her on the street i would atleast think from start she's 17 and if she told me she was 20 i would believe her. And even if he broke the law it wouldn't help us very much to lock away the dad when there is a source of help.
About the economic situation our biggest hope now lies with the child just becoming an addition to their current family. In other words almost as getting a sibling.
I've helped raise two children through their 4 first years so fortunately i have extensive and recent experience of us three now who will handle the situation. I don't trust the dad that's why i took charge of the situation. If i had to i would get over to their place and babysit the child every single day, which i probably will.
She is still very lucky that, even though what she's done and how she acts, she still got support and people willing to help her. I know enough about children that i can tell you that i will not allow that child to suffer.

:/ see all that tells me theres alot more going on at home then you realize, 9 year olds dont up and date 15 year olds just like that, at 9 years old i was more interested in barbie dolls then boys at that time boys had cooties and all i wanted was to go outside and play in the dirt, from what you said it sounds like a classic case of an abused child most likely sexual abuse, which needs to be looked into. If any child is having sex even before they are 13 there is something wrong, that you cant fix, only someone professional can

It doesn't actually work that way. You can't "unformally" adopt your grandchild. You have to go through the court system to be named either the legal guardian, or formally adopt, otherwise you cannot, by law, make any decisions for the child including things like medical decisions, daycare settings, and registering for school. Just because the 13 year old is a minor does not mean legal responsibility for a baby falls to the parents, in many cases a state considers the barely teenaged mother emancipated, even though she still isn't allowed to make any decisions for herself.

This can cause serious repercussions later on, like say if the irresponsible child-mom decides to take off for a couple of weeks, and that kid gets sick or injured. Without the formality, the grandparents cannot make legal decisions on treatment without a hearing, and sometimes social workers and child welfare workers get involved. They can't even pick up the kid from daycare without consent. Nope, it's not as simple these days to just raise the kid as your own.

Oh, and she's 13! Pregnant or not, she doesn't get to make these choices herself, who cares how she feels? She's already shown she's a terrible decision maker and can't be trusted.

Look, you don't have to like what I say, but do me a favor and keep it in the back of your mind, it'll be useful later. Remember that the opinions I'm giving you are from someone who's actually been through this, not from watching it on that pregnant teen MTV show, OK?

AMEN!!!!!! all of what you said has been true mmhmm