Not having much time for me.

[Anita]

I've lived with my boyfriend for about 4 months now, and before that we were long distance for a while. We were both working full time back then so not having much contact didn't bother us, because we would still talk late at night for a few hours.

We both just moved to different cities because he has to start up a company and I have to go to school. The first few days were fine, we still talked for a few hours/ emailed over the course of the day, but 4 days ago everything came to a standstill.

He either responds to my texts with smily faces or one word, and he usually texts me before he goes to bed but hasn't been. All it takes for me is "going to bed, miss you" and I'm perfectly happy, but he's stopped even doing that.

I understand he's busy being mister CEO etc, but how do I deal with a sudden complete drop in attention? He's hardly said a word to me in the last few days, and while I can usually deal with that just fine, for some reason I'm finding it unbearable now. Is it just the hard shift from living together/ working together 24/7 to being on other sides of the country?

[leonina]

I would give it a little more time before you start getting really concerned with this. Sometimes we have slumps in the LD and just aren't in the mood to talk. If you can, start sending texts that require more than one word answers, like "What are some things you did today?" Maybe that will help. Or text him goodnight regularly to get him into the routine again.

[LadyMarchHare]

Being one who's become used to an occasional text every few days/once a week if that, three 5 minute internet conversations, 2 short phone calls, and no webcam since May I can guesstimate work is eating your guy's time more than it's him. My SO's job has kept him from contacting me as much as I like, but I know he works long hours 7 days a week with a rare day off that's usually spent catching up on missed sleep (he lives on energy drinks now) or running errands for groceries or whatever the house needs. Is it fun? No. But there's a time where you have to begrudgingly be understanding. If you think it's something else entirely, simply ask him in a text and don't send another text until he answers that one. May take a day or so, but if that's your main venue of communication right now, it's what you have to work with.

If it is indeed a slump, that means you need to work hard and get his cooperation to dig yourselves out of it because if it's him, you have a right to be a little mad and to want more attention. It's only when the culprit's an outside source like a job that you can't blame him, which I know is hard. Some days I want to fuss at him, but I know he doesn't enjoy the work and he needs the money.

[noodle]

I know that lol I'm goin through almost the same.
From daily messages on FB I could wake up to I can barely get him to answer mines lol
But take it slowly give him his time and try yourself to not freak out. Trust me it'll be easier for you to take it and easier for him to deal with everything cause there is no extra pressure on him

[Karringtyn]

I agree give it time. Let him get things settled. Keep the lines of communication open...and it will all work out....

[okapi]

i can understand how u feel as i post the similar threads here previously.
like most things stop (not everything but most), lost contact, no communications
U don't know he still miss u or not, still think of u or not, feel like u r not important to him

I go crazy nearly from the beginning, now is near to a month for his business trip
from what we chat everyday to 1 or 2 emails per wk
this is really tight, u need to get used to it

But remember he still want u, otherwise he won't give u even a word or a smile
Just a little sms or email, maybe not enough.
But this mean he still think of u, u r in his mind.

This is what I believe and support our love for me
hope it can help u go through it too

[Mio]

You can talk to him about it and describe how you feel, maybe he hasn't realize it.

[T.Ruis]

yeah i'm dealing with the same,, she got busy with theater... so from daily messages we wen't to one or two mails every week. it's killing me! i'm still used to the three messages a day thing.