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Should I continue to wait?

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    Should I continue to wait?

    I've been communicating with a man LD for almost a year as of February 8th. We have a lot in common and we have some of the same views, however, I started sending good morning quotes and night quotes everyday, but he has slacked on the responses and when he does it's usually one word fee response. I asked him if he still had an interest in me or meeting me. He said he definitely want to still meet me, but don't know what he wants as far as wife or not. I think he's afraid. What should I do???

    #2
    You're overreacting. Sending him good morning and goodnight quotes everyday, and expecting the same back, may just be asking too much. If he works, has responsibilities, has a family, he may not have time to talk to you everyday, and send quotes he needs to research a few times daily. I think you should relax and have a talk with him about your communication expectations, and how much is actually realistic. Then you should plan a meeting.

    Also, what in the world are you doing, mentioning the word "wife" before you've even met? I think you should at least meet before you start worrying about what he wants in a wife.
    Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. ~Albert Einstein

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      #3
      I agree with Moon. I send my SO texts before he goes to work and before I go to bed every day. He doesn't always respond, and I don't expect him to. I do it for me, and I do it so he knows I'm thinking about him and I genuinely hope he has a good at work.

      If you're really concerned, you could always just ask him if the texts are too much and if he'd like you to cut back. Sometimes some people might find it overwhelming, some might find it flattering. Everyone is different.

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        #4
        In any relationship, things tend to settle down over time. Even CD, you get into routine or just become really comfortable around each other. If you are concerned, the only thing you can do is speak with him about it.

        A year is a long time to go without a first meet. Have you at least Skyped?
        To those who dream, nothing is ever far away.

        ​Distance is to love as wind is to fire. It blows out the little ones and fans the big ones.

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          #5
          I would say that he's not crazy for being unsure about marriage. I've been dating my SO for a year and a half and we were friends for 5 years before that. We're just hitting a point where we're ready to start seriously talking about it, and even then I'm more ready than he is. Every moved at a different pace. My best friend from high school knew right away they would get married (granted, they were also friends for 5 years before dating). This freaked me out because we started dating 4 days apart and I thought if my current SO was the one for me then I should know right away, but that's simply not true. We both need time to slowly grow to that phase of life of being ready for marriage and being ready to commit to someone, and that's okay. That time and space is different for everyone. I know someone else who dated for 7 years before getting married. Ruby, you've known each other for a year and haven't met in person yet. Let things take their course, it's very possible he is afraid, but that doesn't mean that he won't figure it out. Before you get too caught up in your worries, just figure out meeting in person. You have to be the one to decide what risk is worth it. Would you rather wait and know how you both really feel or would you rather get out and play the field so you don't waste time dating the wrong person. We can't answer that for you. We'll be here as a support but in the end you have to decide. Best of luck to you both!

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            #6
            You have some great advice here. I just want to add: of course he's afraid! LD is a scary thing. I've been with my SO over two years and we have been CD about half the time and I'm still afraid! You never know if it's going to work out or (and here's the kicker) when. There is a lot that you just have to go with the flow for LD to work and that makes it pretty terrifying. You two have an added level or terror because you've never met. If I were you, I would push to have that first meeting sooner rather than later. It is pretty difficult to have serious talks about marriage or closing the distance when you've never met. Take it one step at a time and see where things go.

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              #7
              Talking about marriage and you haven't met? Wow. Slow down.

              Arrange to meet as soon as you can. It's nuts to be thinking that far ahead already.

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