first time visiting her in a week.. so many insecurities

[AnalogueAnimal]

After months of postponing, delays, bad times.. I finally bought my flight tickets and I will be seeing her in a week. This is my first ever visiting another country all alone.

I have so many insecurities right now. I wonder what if she doesn't like me the moment she sees me? I wonder what if there's no chemistry in bed.. She has high expectations of sex since she is virgin and I am too.

And she is saying she might consider break up because I delayed so much and disappointed her too much.. but I just wanted to prove to her so I'm going.
Is there anything I need to be aware of? Do's and dont's? I'm gonna look up on google.

I would like to hear from the one's who have already faced this before.

Thanks

[Astysuphos]

Hi and welcome to LFAD!

I know the stress of meeting your SO for the first time... Its been half a year now but when i think back to that moment.. god i was so nervous...
I understand your feeling of insecurity. How long are you guys together already? I had been with my boyfriend for one month at that time so thats not very long. (5 months of chatting before though but only one moth of skype) I was super insecure aswell. Im very small, i dont consider myself pretty or sexy and he is just amazing and i was afraid that my appearance might scare him of, but it all went totally okay! I dont want to be idealistic since, ofcourse sometimes there is no spark when meeting in real life but that is mostly not very often since you have already survived the distance for some time. That speaks as in that she defenitely loves you ^^

I'm not experienced at sex so I dont think i can help u with that though but since im virgin aswell... from what i read from it it might be hurtfull at first so if it hurts i dont think you should blame that at yourself. Also from what i hear just have a nice play before. Also, its only the first time you guys get to see eachother and i wouldnt want to directly 'jump' in bed, but that might just be me... if you start hugging and cuddling i think you will feel the right time ^^ But again, thats just me and my prefference. I don't know anything about ur gf so if she is totally diff then me just ignore this

I think it would be weird for her to just break up bc u had to delay it. If she really is in love then she wont ever think of that after u guys met up ^^ Maybe tell a bit more about her and ur relationship? ^^

Hope i could help u a bit..

[nelle]

So I haven't met my S/O yet, but when we talk about meeting we make sure our expectations aren't too high. That would be my advice to you and your S/O, be open to making mistakes, learning about and from each other and laughing about it afterwards...it's all a part of the journey

[R&R]

It can be nerve-wracking meeting someone for the first time. You can read lots of stories on here of people who were nervous and then that all went away as soon as they saw each other. There probably isn't a way not to be nervous but when a negative comes into your mind, counter it with a positive thought.

As far as sex, there shouldn't be high expectations set. You are both virgins. This isn't the movies where it's all rainbows and butterflies while romantic music plays in the background and it was the most amazing thing ever. Truth is, it's probably going to be somewhat awkward. You'll both learn together. Take your time. Remember, sex is supposed to be fun. You're allowed to laugh and have fun.

I would always suggest having a backup plan in place. When I would go visit for the first time, I would make sure I knew of local hotels and car rentals in the area. I checked out the area and things to do. I did that in case things didn't work out, I wasn't stuck someplace I didn't want to be for a few days. I never had to use the backup plan, but I was at least prepared. I also never told the person I had a Plan B -that info was just for me.

[BaconGirl05]

I think most people get nervous about meeting their SO for the first time, I know I definitely was. It's perfectly normal to feel nervous

I agree that she shouldn't have high expectations with sex. Since you are both virgins, it may take some time to find your rhythm. My SO and I lost our virginity to each other. Before we met, when we talked about sex, we expected it to be so great and awesome the first time. The truth is that it was kind of awkward and kind of painful. Now that we've gotten used to each others bodies, everything is great. Take your time with each other and learn together. Try not to put pressure on yourself.

I'm sorry she's said that she may consider breaking up because of things being postponed. It could just be that she really wanted to meet you and was disappointed things didn't work out. In my own experience, my SO and I talked for years about meeting. On multiple occasions, I remember my SO saying he was planning to come visit me, but plans fell through. I remember this happening multiple times throughout the years of our relationship. Yes, I was really disappointed and I did wonder if breaking up would be better. I felt as though nothing would happen and that we'd never be able to meet. But then again, I understood why my SO had to keep postponing his plans. Perhaps your SO feels like you guys may never meet? I'm sure once you're there and she sees that, things will be alright. But as R&R said, have a back up plan just in case things don't work out.

[WarwickGuy]

You should be fine, as most people get on well when they meet their SO in real life for the first time, although there is always a chance it won't work out as meeting in person is different. I'm sure she's just as nervous in case you don't find her attractive, because you both like each other and hope it will go well. Beforehand, take a deep breath and greet her with a smile

As far as sex, there shouldn't be high expectations set. You are both virgins. This isn't the movies where it's all rainbows and butterflies while romantic music plays in the background and it was the most amazing thing ever. Truth is, it's probably going to be somewhat awkward. You'll both learn together. Take your time. Remember, sex is supposed to be fun. You're allowed to laugh and have fun.

And I laughed from that idealised description. As R&R says, expectations shouldn't be high, if you've watched porn forget everything you've seen. As long as you find the person sexually attractive then that's all that matters, as it'll be an experience for you two to share. You don't need to worry, just relax and enjoy the experience and any worries you have will disappear with time. In addition, use protection and be slow as it'll most likely hurt her first time.

The plan B is also a good idea :3