we had the ex fight today.

[nena_marie]

ex's can be an issue, one I haven't dealt with until today.
Doug has had 1 girlfriend before me for a little over 3 years. they have been over with since over a year ago. They randomly would talk here and there but she stopped once she found out Doug had a girlfriend (me!!!). I guess I kinda just assumed he never wanted to talk to her again and had no need to. So she texted him last night and when I called him on my break at work he told me. I felt like someone punched me in the stomach. I went back into work with an awful feeling, lucky after work I had a long talk with ML (my mom) and felt better and confident in what I needed to say. As weird as this may be the way Doug and I resolved it was amazing. We deff got through it but he left the door open for his ex to text him again whats going to happen then???

ughhhhh

[xMesmerize124]

You shouldn't worry about him keeping in contact with his ex, he loves you so i don't think there will be anything you should worry about. My bf still talks to his ex randomly here and there, they were together for a long time so its kind of hard i guess to just stop talking. He loves me and i don't really worry about anything happening between them again and in your case you shouldn't really worry about your bf and his ex. I hope that made sense and my so called advice helped some

[nena_marie]

Thank you and I do trust him I guess Im just more worried about how she will act. Either way we resolved it and its a really good feeling cause this could have gotten ugly.

[artfuldodger]

hie,
i think the good thing here is that he is not the one making contact, she is the one doing it. so i guess that counts for something.

not to get into your head or something... but i do believe that exes are a no go area in my opinion. i think if you have had feelings for that person (your ex) no matter how much you DO NOT want to be with them again, i think you will one day see something in them that you liked and you could want to get back ( mixed feelings )..... you get me.

and its always the single ex you worry about..

[amandamayaaa]

i know what you mean

my boyfriend doesn't really talk to his ex much anymore(they dated for 2 1/2 years, which i'm jealous she had that time with him that i didn't) anyways.. but whenever he would bring up that they did talk i would have that feeling in my stomach of uncertainty, like ugh it makes me feel weird when they talked. but he's going through a jealousy issue right now with me(he wrote a post about it called trust if you want to read) so i have just learned to accept it because in his case.. he has to deal with seeing/hearing about the person he's jealous of every single day.. where as his ex isn't a huge part of his life anymore

anyways, i learned the same thing other people have said.. he's with me now.. i'm his.. so it shouldn't matter if he talks to his ex or not. i still talk to my ex from time to time, and i would be annoyed if he didn't let me talk to him. it's harmless. there are no more feelings there what so ever. eric and i are in love and happy, thats all that matters!

[underthewater]

Girls, if your bf was with an ex for N years and now you are in a LDR, don't be jealous! Think about it from another perspective: she wasted N years! And now even you don't have that much time with him, the time you may spend in the future can be unlimited. And I always tell myself that it doesn't really matter who the "first girlfriend" is, thewhole point here is trying to be the "last girlfriend"-well, and possibly the "last wife" then. When you think about this, all his history doesn't matter.

[MTK]

Considering that he told you about it right off the bat and that she was the one to make contact i don't really think there is anything to worry about. Also the fact that his ex limited contact with him when she found out that he has a girlfriend(you) shows to some extent that she respects your relationship.
I don't think you have anything to worry about but if it indeed makes you uncomfortable you should tell your boyfriend that, so he knows how you feel about the situation and act accordingly.

[paulawriteslove]

I don't think that there is anything to worry about I'm glad to hear that you resolved it!

[noodle]

My SO is good friends with his ex aswell. I have to say I dont like her much but due to him bein my man I dont like any girls he hangs/talks to ^^
but dont worry bout the textin I mean he wouldnt date you if he wouldnt love you

[nena_marie]

you guys are all great )

[Karringtyn]

Don't even give it a second thought! Hon he didn't hide it from you...he told you.

Exes are just that people X'ed out of our lives.

You are the one NOW.

[Andy]

Girls, if your bf was with an ex for N years and now you are in a LDR, don't be jealous! Think about it from another perspective: she wasted N years! And now even you don't have that much time with him, the time you may spend in the future can be unlimited. And I always tell myself that it doesn't really matter who the "first girlfriend" is, thewhole point here is trying to be the "last girlfriend"-well, and possibly the "last wife" then. When you think about this, all his history doesn't matter.

Very well put, what a great post

Tanja was with her ex for 8 years or so, they have a child together and speak regularly and are still good friends, I've met him a few times and he seems like a nice bloke from what I can make out, it's kinda hard to tell when you both speak different languages

But yeah, I don't think there's anything to worry about, I think you might be reading a little too much into it, it's not big deal

If it really makes you uncomfortable then let him know, but if I was you I wouldn't expect him to cut off all contact with her, 3 years is a long time and I'm sure there's nothing to it. Like you said, you trust him