It was barely two weeks and it's over

[Chris516]

Some people can't handle a long distance relationship. It does not make them a bad person.
This relationship was 2weeks in. They haven't met Irl yet. He was honest enough to say something now. That does not make it ok for name calling. Being honest does not ever make you a twerp.

Yes, I know(ho hum). But he knew right from the start it would be LD. His friends were probably always a priority over her. Forget his honesty. It is shallow at best. The only good thing he did for her is, 'cut himself out of the deal'.

[sasad]

Yes, I know(ho hum). But he knew right from the start it would be LD. His friends were probably always a priority over her. Forget his honesty. It is shallow at best. The only good thing he did for her is, 'cut himself out of the deal'.

Not sure what the ho hum even means.... Or why the single quotes all the time.
So what, he probably never was in ldr, and gave it a try. Again, who are you to say anything against him being honest, shallow or a twerp. You don't know.
So you think it's better he stayed in and lied to keep it going obviously.

[HisLittleBear]

I'm sorry. And maybe you don't want to hear this, but at least you found out the truth very early on, rather than being led further astray. I know it doesn't change the fact it happened, but you know a relationship is a two-way road, not a one-way street. Be kind to yourself

Me too. Least I wasn't led on for weeks.

[HisLittleBear]

I'm sorry this happened, but I agree with Honour that at least you weren't even more invested. Unfortunately some people can't do long-distance.

Yeah, at least there was that.

What sucks though is he is the one that said distance didn't matter. I asked if he was sure and he said yeah. Then suddenly, it was. And we hadn't even met yet.

[HisLittleBear]

Some people just really can't handle the distance or need to have that physical touch all the time. It's better they are up front about it as soon as possible.

It's not a reflection on you as a person. It doesn't mean that he didn't care. It just means he wasn't prepared to handle it and he came clean with you about it.

But he said he could. That's my issue. He knew when we got together that it was an LDR. It changed in a day.

[HisLittleBear]

Not sure what the ho hum even means.... Or why the single quotes all the time.
So what, he probably never was in ldr, and gave it a try. Again, who are you to say anything against him being honest, shallow or a twerp. You don't know.
So you think it's better he stayed in and lied to keep it going obviously.

Actually, he has been in only LDRs since his ex four years ago. Apparently they keep ending.

[sasad]

Better for your all the way around. You will find someone xo

[Chris516]

Not sure what the ho hum even means.... Or why the single quotes all the time.

Ho hum means 'Yeah, I know'. Single quotes represent thoughts, feelings, emotions, and to highlight without use of bold type. If you don't like the way I post. You are free not to read it.

So what, he probably never was in ldr, and gave it a try.

Just as you say that he may never have been in an LDR, and wanted to give it a try. I don't buy him being that genuine. Why, While my experience that I remember. Was not an LDR situation. The girl that asked me out between my Junior and Senior years in high school did something similar. Like the OP's situation, the girl I dated for three weeks. Had something more important in the background. The girl I dated for three weeks used me until her real boyfriend was released from the county lockup. What is the common thread there. In addition to the short number of weeks.......honesty(rather lack thereof).

Again, who are you to say anything against him being honest, shallow or a twerp. You don't know.

Because, He basically took the OP for an 'emotional rollercoaster'.

So you think it's better he stayed in and lied to keep it going obviously.

No, He should never have been in the relationship to begin with. Because his friends' were more important than the OP.

[R&R]

This is how dating works either LD or CD. You try it and if it doesn't work or you find you don't feel the same way, then you end it. Sometimes you can figure it out pretty quickly. When in my 30's, my friends told me I had a flavor of the day instead of a flavor of the week. I could tell pretty quickly if there was potential, and if there wasn't, I certainly wasn't going to lead the guy on. You give it a try and if it works, great - but if it doesn't, then end it.

Yes, there are some people out there who strictly use other people in friendships and relationships. For that, you live and you learn.

[sasad]

Ho hum means 'Yeah, I know'. Single quotes represent thoughts, feelings, emotions, and to highlight without use of bold type. If you don't like the way I post. You are free not to read it.
Yup. Just confusing sometimes if you reread your post. Your punctuation is really hard to understand.. Just some constructive suggestions for helping your sentence structure for English as a second language speaking people.

Just as you say that he may never have been in an LDR, and wanted to give it a try. I don't buy him being that genuine. Why, While my experience that I remember. Was not an LDR situation. The girl that asked me out between my Junior and Senior years in high school did something similar. Like the OP's situation, the girl I dated for three weeks. Had something more important in the background. The girl I dated for three weeks used me until her real boyfriend was released from the county lockup. What is the common thread there. In addition to the short number of weeks.......honesty(rather lack thereof).

What is the common thread? There is a bit of a difference between 17ish year olds(your relationship from years ago) and 30 year olds (OP), as well as being locked up and waiting for a boyfriend vs what the OP went through. He was honest. He said he couldn't do it.. Also, there are two sides to every story.

Because, He basically took the OP for an 'emotional rollercoaster'.

Again, it was two weeks... It wasn't 2 years of yes we are on, no we are off. And most relationships are on the high part of the rollercoaster when we start as well...

No, He should never have been in the relationship to begin with. Because his friends' were more important than the OP.

We don't know that. OP even said he was in other LD relationships that never worked. That in itself should have been a flag.

I am not arguing with you. I just don't agree that it is always the "other persons" fault. Because it takes two to make or break a relationship and that name calling and assuming are not the best ways to deal with situations. That thinking you know EXACTLY what the other person was thinking in feeling is just not possible.

Like R&R states....You try it and if it doesn't work or you find you don't feel the same way, then you end it. Sometimes you can figure it out pretty quickly. That doesn't make anybody the bad guy is what I am saying. It was 2 weeks.

OP- I am NOT in any shape or form saying you are not hurting. Breakups always seem to hurt and I am truly sorry you are hurting. Especially after letting yourself trust someone again...