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I'm new and I need some advice regarding my long distance relationship

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    I'm new and I need some advice regarding my long distance relationship

    Hi, my name is Dylan. I am 23 years young. I am looking for help in any sort of advice or way to meet a woman I've been talking to since early September that's going by the alias of Zelda Mae. I met her when she went by the name of Echo. We met on an app called FriendLife. I was doing a video live stream & she came in to watch my stream. We then started talking the next day, one thing led to another and we started dating. However, we've been on and off through out the months. She broke up with about 3 times total. She made excuses that she had things happen to her that I can not disclose.

    We have been trying to meet up for months and everytime we try to, something happens. Some of the things that have happened were, she got sick and she can't travel now, she had things happen to her, and other reasons.

    I feel though sometimes she is hiding something from me that she doesn't want me to know. We're madly in love but I want to know if she's who she says she really is. We've FaceTimed and everything, I know she is real but I am unsure if the person she is on the inside is she really is. She is currently in Los Angeles right now while I'm right outside of Charlotte, NC. She had been in Colorado for the longest time including when we first met.

    I love her, and I just want this to be the real deal. Like sometimes I don't understand why the things that have happened are happening? Is there anyone out there who can help me especially people who may have oddly been in a situation like this before? Any advice or help would be much appreciated.

    Thank you for taking the time to read this.

    #2
    Originally posted by RealDKBeatz View Post
    Hi, my name is Dylan. I am 23 years young. I am looking for help in any sort of advice or way to meet a woman I've been talking to since early September that's going by the alias of Zelda Mae. I met her when she went by the name of Echo. We met on an app called FriendLife. I was doing a video live stream & she came in to watch my stream. We then started talking the next day, one thing led to another and we started dating. However, we've been on and off through out the months. She broke up with about 3 times total. She made excuses that she had things happen to her that I can not disclose.

    We have been trying to meet up for months and every time we try to, something happens. Some of the things that have happened were, she got sick and she can't travel now, she had things happen to her, and other reasons.

    I feel though sometimes she is hiding something from me that she doesn't want me to know. We're madly in love but I want to know if she's who she says she really is. We've FaceTimed and everything, I know she is real but I am unsure if the person she is on the inside is she really is. She is currently in Los Angeles right now while I'm right outside of Charlotte, NC. She had been in Colorado for the longest time including when we first met.

    I love her, and I just want this to be the real deal. Like sometimes I don't understand why the things that have happened are happening? Is there anyone out there who can help me especially people who may have oddly been in a situation like this before? Any advice or help would be much appreciated.

    Thank you for taking the time to read this.
    Dylan, Welcome to LFAD.

    If you cannot disclose the 'excuses'. I wouldn't necessarily think of them as 'excuses', but 'reasons'.

    Since she got sick, and can't travel now. Can you travel to see her? Was she in Colorado for treatment of whatever she is sick with?

    Do you feel you are being 'catfished'?

    First Visit: September 2016
    Second Visit: January 2017 (Her birthday)
    Third Visit: June 2018 (medical conference near her home)

    John 3:16
    For God so loved the world. That he gave his only begotten son. For whosoever believeth in him. Shall not perish but have eternal life
    John 4:12
    I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

    Comment


      #3
      I've been talking to since early September that's going by the alias of Zelda Mae. I met her when she went by the name of Echo.
      Welcome to LFAD.....I read your above statement. It's been over 6months and you don't know her real name?????
      I'm sorry to be blunt run don't walk away.

      Comment


        #4
        In this short amount of time, you've broken up three times, had multiple plans cancelled and she won't tell you what's really going on in her life. In any relationship, you need honesty, trust and communication and you aren't getting any of those.

        I agree that it's time to walk away. Block her and move forward. You don't need these games.
        To those who dream, nothing is ever far away.

        ​Distance is to love as wind is to fire. It blows out the little ones and fans the big ones.

        Comment


          #5
          Originally posted by Elizabeth123 View Post
          Welcome to LFAD.....I read your above statement. It's been over 6months and you don't know her real name?????
          I'm sorry to be blunt run don't walk away.
          No, he didn't say he doesn't know her name, he said she's going by that alias. My husband used charley as his alias and I would refer to him as charley when talking about him, just so it wouldn't be tracked back to him, privacy and stuff.

          @OP - you guys will either have to figure out a way to meet or you figure your problems out. How old is your girlfriend? I'm asking because it'd make more sense how often she broke up with you the younger she is. If she is who she is, I can only tell you that sometimes life throws obstacles in your way and there is literally nothing you can do about them, sometimes life just sucks, but that doesn't mean that she can just rely on that. If you are willing to meet, there is a way.

          When I first met my husband I didn't have any money, I lived at home and went to college and every job I applied to declined me, it was frustrating, but I knew I needed a job to be able to pay for my plane tickets or we would never meet, so I kept on trying until I found a job and saved all my money, so while life can make it hard for you, you gotta keep trying your best.

          Relationship began: 05/22/2012
          First Met: 03/21/2013 - 03/30/2013
          Second Visit: 06/06/2013 - 08/21/2013 ~ Proposal: 07/06/2013 ♥
          Third Visit: 10/09/2013 - 01/08/2013
          Closed the distance: 11/20/2014 ♥
          Married: 1/24/2015
          Became Resident: 9/14/2015

          Comment


            #6
            I'm confused as to what type of specific advice you are looking for. What to say to her? How to figure out of way to make travel plans work? How to work out time management problems? How to adjust to her health problems?

            It's really hard to know what to say since you can't explain what her problems or reasons for not coming are. What about you going to see her? Or meeting in the middle? I would suggest as a shot in the dark that you openly talk to her about how you are feeling and also try to figure out a compromise to make it work. Split the costs if needed, mostly just find out why she isn't meeting you yet and see if you can assist her in helping her to be able to come or having you come.
            "Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. "
            Benjamin Franklin

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