Social Media Affection

[curlywave]

Hi there,

I'm quite sure that for LDR social media is one of our limited ways to show affection to our loved one. Like giving reaction to FB or IG's posts, posting a picture of both of you.
Kindly share your thoughts about it
Is it necessary or annoying? Or do you have something else in mind?

Thank you!

[Katy_G]

It really depends on your SO's take also on social media. But I find generally people do not appreciate 'oversharing' every little drama or detail of the relationship.

My SO and I don't like sharing our personal problems or venting online. For one thing, I'm a physician in training, and bound to keep plenty of things confidential. However we like sending/tagging each other in posts or links we think the other would like.

[C.C.]

I think it depends on a couple as well.
Some like sharing it and expressing it a lot, some are more private. I am a private person for example, but if I weren't, I wouldn't care what would others think. Like at all.
Though, don't forget, too much is too much and no one appreciates that. But some things are just cute and completely up to the people involved.

In my case, our social media affection is limited to liking each others' things and we don't really post often either. However, after meetup I'd gladly share the pictures of us and that's about as far as I'd take it, but again, that's me.

[Miasmata]

Depends entirely on the couple! For me personally, it's not a big part of what we do. We have a few communities we are both part of, including a forum where we met, and we crack jokes at each other and such there. I don't have Facebook and my SO uses his barely at all. We don't really share photos of each other online or anything, aside from the bare minimum to satisfy his family. We prefer to be more silly with each other in public and keep the affection private (well, I do - My SO has his occasional fit of being all over the PDA, which is a bit much for me, haha)

[WarwickGuy]

I do agree that it depends on the people in the relationship. In my relationship I'm the person who shares less, but I will like and comment on my SO's posts, upload a few photos when we do meet. In comparison, she shares many more photos and we both share links we think the other will like on their FB walls.

However, neither of us every post about arguments we're having (unlike some annoying couples), likewise, we don't act lovey dovey on social media either (like some other couples do too).

[R&R]

We are pretty limited on social media. I tend to share pictures from visits, etc but he keeps his pretty limited. We aren't even friends with each other on FB. I see it cause so much drama, both LD & CD, that we really just don't bother a lot with it. I also never post out there if we are having issues because no one really needs to know..........or if I do want to talk to someone for advice or to vent, I do it individually.

[BaconGirl05]

It definitely depends on the couple and if they want to share things or not.

Personally, I share photos on Facebook of me and my SO because I'm in a different country than my friends and family. My Facebook is full of my family and friends, so it's nice to share with them what we're up to. We take a lot of pictures, but I don't post them all on social media, only a few pictures, because that would be excessive. Other than that, I never really use Facebook. Mostly just looking to see what others are up to. I especially never post if we're having problems. It really annoys me when people do that.

[Ejoriah]

Agree with everyone else, it depends on the couple.

For us, we never ever post about things like disagreements or fights. We also have a policy that our profile pictures would always just be us individually and not a cute couple picture. He tends to post about projects/adventures we do, such as pictures from our garden or our hike. I post similar things but I am more likely to post selfies of the two of us or cute posts. Once in a while he'll write something cute about me.

[Honour]

I once knew a couple where the guy got the girl pregnant, they kept breaking up, blah blah blah. I got so pissed off of them broadcasting their stupidity and arguments to the world that, when he made a sick joke about committing suicide, I said my peace and enough was enough. Sure, I got called every name under the son - "He's the most responsible guy I know!" (LOL) - but I just removed him and his ex from my profile after that.

I can't stand that sort of behaviour. My social media gives me the ability to see people's businesses if I want to check up on friends and people I knew in highschool, see how they're doing, etc. but I would never ever post the downs in my relationship, laid bear for the world to judge. I can just remove what I don't want to see, who I don't want to see. My SO and I aren't friends on Facebook, he never uses his, and I barely post anything on mine. I have my relationship status stating the fact I'm in a relationship and have been since our anniversary, but there's no pictures of him on there. I will, however, post a picture of us together when we meet for the first time, and it'll probably go as my new profile picture. That's about it though.

[aoitori]

My SO barely uses fb, I use it occassionally. We never use it to communicate though. I would post pictures from time to time, but only if he's okay with it. So it definitely depends on the couple.

[C.C.]

I just had a moment of sudden realisation while looking at new posts. it's blue bird, aoi tori~

Anyway, I didn't notice when sharing arguments on Facebook was mentioned, but I am so against it. I don't even tell my friends except for my closest one who knows a lot about my relationship and understands me the best. And it's not like I don't trust others, I just don't want others' opinions and attitudes involved unless I fail to handle it myself, and even then I am trying to keep it to my best friend only because it's such a private thing.
On the other hand, me and my SO's main communication involves Facebook chat and Messenger.

[QueenReginaMills]

My SO and I were friends before we got together, our Facebook status is as in a relationship with each other, but a lot of what we do on social media is just things like sharing links the other would like and commenting on each other's pictures and posts. The affectionate stuff goes on chat and I wouldn't share arguments publicly.

[differentcountries]

We try to be very discreete about our relationship in social media. We are both very social and engaged in our jobs and friends/family, so our focus is on that. The idea of venting a relationship problem on Facebook gives me the chills, and it makes me cringe when others hint about such things. If we fight, I can keep it to myself! Maybe vent here.... We post a couple of pictures here and there, but nothing too much and not kissing pictures etc. We are very comfortable PDA'ing when noone are taking pictures, of course it depends on what we do. We often hang at his workplace and it is not like we will kiss in front of his boss... We use Facebook a lot to merge our social circles, and even his coworkers and friends are befriending my husband too. Focusing on friendship is of course also a way of not getting a whole lot of attention about poly. We are not out to his mum nor my parents, so I dont want to be seen kissing my husband and the other way around. There are some people who are all over each others on Facebook, I think that's just weird. Our love is very private and I dont want everyone I know to get insight into that.

I sometimes post things on his wall, but it is not heart stuff, it is more like a funny pic or something interesting like tree houses (he loves them). He often likes and comments my pics, sometimes with hearts lol

[kittyxuchiha11]

Maybe this is just because i'm gay and the world is still a very scary place but i feel I can only really be affectionate with my SO in places online where I feel safe. Facebook for both of us is just the place we talk and sometimes share links on each others timelines. We both have that we're in a relationship on our profiles but it doesn't say with each other, it's only really there in case people think they have a chance with either of us so they can look and see they don't. Facebook just isn't a place where we share our relationship at all, if anything people only know i'm dating someone in America because i'll post pictures of us when we finally get pictures. where as on Tumblr we are very very open about our relationship and both tag each another in posts often and talk to each other in the tags. I have a page on my blog about her and our relationship and people seem to really love it and message me quite a lot about how cute we are as a couple. and that's totally fine because on tumblr we both seem to feel quite safe and like we can share our relationship and not have anyone really hateful simply because we're not a straight couple.

[neddrick98]

Totally depends on the couple! We use SM still quite a bit, but definitely did during our distance.