Break-up

[London-Bridge]

My long distance girlfriend who went to America for 4 months broke up with me after it only being one month. She said she can not deal with the emotional issues and its to much for her to handle. She said shes changed how she thinks whilst over there and she didn't realize she'd change this much. I feel as if its my own fault.

She told me she wants to go back to America (shes at a camp) again next year and that in two years time once she finishes her degree, leave where we both live.

She said she wants to talk when she gets back and to remain friends in the mean time.
I feel like I just lost my other half.

[Katy_G]

So sorry to hear this.

At least you guys have an open line of communication. It may help make things bearable.

[WarwickGuy]

I'm very sorry to hear this too.

Make sure you take the time to recover and you always have LFAD as a support network Also, it's up to you whether being friends will be the best thing for you or not. Also, maybe mistakes were made in the relationship, but don't blame yourself too much, it'll only make you to continue focusing on the pain.

[ChloChlo]

I'm sorry this happened. It totally sucks. Don't feel like it's your fault - she said that she changed, and that happens in life. Be gentle with yourself.

[Redheart14]

I'm sorry! dont blame yourself sometimes it's not the right time that's all. Do you want to stay friends? Or will that be too hard?

[whatruckus]

I'm sorry. Don't take it personally and feel like it was your fault, I guarantee that it wasn't. A majority of the reasons why people break up with each other is because one, or both of the people in the relationship change. Sometimes you change for the better, and it makes your relationship stronger. Sometimes, it goes the opposite way. Hang in there, and we're always here if you need somewhere to vent, or receive advice. It doesn't matter to us if you're in an LDR, Single, or CDR. We're always here and around.

[London-Bridge]

I'm going to try my hardest to get her back.

[R&R]

My long distance girlfriend who went to America for 4 months broke up with me after it only being one month. She said she can not deal with the emotional issues and its to much for her to handle. She said shes changed how she thinks whilst over there and she didn't realize she'd change this much. I feel as if its my own fault.

She told me she wants to go back to America (shes at a camp) again next year and that in two years time once she finishes her degree, leave where we both live.

She said she wants to talk when she gets back and to remain friends in the mean time.
I feel like I just lost my other half.

She has given you plenty of reasons as to why she has ended the relationship. As hard as it may be, you need to respect her decision and let her go. It's not the movies and trying to get her back is only going to annoy her. By doing that, you are telling her that you don't care what she says or how she feels, you are going to continue to do what you want.

[MariaEx]

May I suggest that until September you try to heal yourself and overcome the anxiety and mistrust problems you have. Try to enjoy yourself and become a better version of you. When she comes back and you talk, you might have a chance of getting back together. I am not telling you that this is a rule but whenever I am in a different environment, I might act a little bit awkward, strange, not being my normal self. When she comes back maybe, just maybe you might have a chance. But the most important thing is to respect her choice and work with yourself. Take care of yourself!

[sasad]

I'm going to try my hardest to get her back.

Please don't do that right now. As much as it hurts, you need to back off and let her be. You will end up as one of the creepy ex stalkers if you don't stop and think before you act.
She wants to stay friends. Respect that. If you cant then let her go for now. Sometimes you need to set someone free to realize what you lost. Give her time. Give YOU time,

[London-Bridge]

I feel like fighting for her back because I know a big part of this is the distance and the fact I wasn't fully supportive but then there's a part of me that just wants to go to sleep ansd not wake up because I half feel its over.

[R&R]

When someone breaks up with us, we always wonder what we did wrong, what we could have done better, etc. Sometimes though, it really has 100% to do with the other person and there was nothing you could have done or could do to change that. Their feelings have changed, they have decided to take a different direction in their lives, etc. From what you've told us, that sounds like it's the case.

My daughters are 20 and 21 and I'm going to tell you exactly what I would tell them (and have told them in the past) - Let it go and move forward. Yes, it's going to hurt for awhile but this relationship wasn't your whole life, so quit acting like it was. You can function, you can continue on with your life, you can take this time to focus on yourself and when you are ready, you can start dating again.

That may sound harsh to you but my daughters have grown to be very independent, self-sufficient and realize what part a relationship plays in their lives. It doesn't mean that they don't have feelings or can't express them but it does mean that they can handle issues, both personal and professional, as adults. You have to grow up sometime and learn how to deal with things and there is no time like the present.

[differentcountries]

Sometimes people change. Sometimes that means a breakup. Not accepting this will not win her back. If she realizes that it was just the distance, she will come to you when she returns. If not, well, it is not up to you anymore. Take your time to grief, you dont have to be her friend right now unless you want to.