When did you say "I love you"?

[QueenD]

Wow...a lot of these are so fast! Sometimes I think coming on this forum actually doesn't help me all that much because I compare myself way too much and tell myself that we are doing it badly

Every person and every relationship is different, so please don't fall into the trap of comparing yourself to others. If you feel like something is off in how your relationship, is progressing, please consider inspecting those feelings carefully, purely in the context of your own relationship and what you need from your relationship. It's much easier to progress a relationship when you can do this and then have conversations about factors such as "I would like to communicate more about how we can grow and improve our relationship" rather than "Alex and Chris said they were in love after 3 weeks, why aren't we?"

For my part, it I get seem that I said I love you kind of fast, but I have had more than one close friendship turn into a relationship. It's almost like I get into a relationship BECAUSE i fell in love, not the other way around. In the case of my current SO, I had a mutual friend tell me recently he saw this coming about 3 years before J and I finally got together. J was actually involved with someone else at the time, and neither of us would have imagined what we have now back thenm so you just never know!

[Jelly11]

I agree that I also find many of these too fast, but maybe it depends on the persons. My SO and I are very rational and won't say something that doesn't have a clear definition to begin with, so we already talked about what "I love you" means and we know what it will imply whenever one of us will say it.

Yeah, we talk about the 'concept' of love a lot. He's never had a relationship so is quite open about having never been in love and that he finds it an odd concept/doesn't understand what it even is. I have had a previous 4 year relationship so am a bit more accustomed to it.

Every person and every relationship is different, so please don't fall into the trap of comparing yourself to others. If you feel like something is off in how your relationship, is progressing, please consider inspecting those feelings carefully, purely in the context of your own relationship and what you need from your relationship. It's much easier to progress a relationship when you can do this and then have conversations about factors such as "I would like to communicate more about how we can grow and improve our relationship" rather than "Alex and Chris said they were in love after 3 weeks, why aren't we?"

For my part, it I get seem that I said I love you kind of fast, but I have had more than one close friendship turn into a relationship. It's almost like I get into a relationship BECAUSE i fell in love, not the other way around. In the case of my current SO, I had a mutual friend tell me recently he saw this coming about 3 years before J and I finally got together. J was actually involved with someone else at the time, and neither of us would have imagined what we have now back thenm so you just never know!

Yeah I know, it's super dangerous. It's hard when LDRs are so new to me so I do grip on to other's experiences on here quite a lot. Like how often should we be talking, how often should we be visiting, should he miss me more, etc etc, but I know I shouldn't do it.

And yes, that is true. I literally didn't know him before our first date five months ago so I haven't had that period to fall in love like others may have done.

[C.C.]

I forgot to mention the date it happened in the initial post. We knew each other since August-September of 2013. We got close at the end of October (2015). The confession happened in the beginning of January 2016.

And yes, that is true. I literally didn't know him before our first date five months ago so I haven't had that period to fall in love like others may have done.

Even more reason for you to not have been as fast. Everyone has got their own speed/pace and it doesn't make any worse, it all comes down to what works the best for you AND your SO (in anything) :3

[xxcazaxx]

Can't remember the exact timescales of things, but remember him saying it pretty quickly (to the point that I was taken aback by the speed of it).

[Honour]

I don't remember exactly when he told me he loved me. I just remember he did it first, and I was in tears because I realised he was dead serious. Even almost 18 months on, I still can't believe he's serious lol

[ChloChlo]

My SO slipped up and said it about a month after we started talking. Surprisingly it didn't freak me out. I knew he had been wanting to say it, but I kept telling him "hold on until we actually meet, I understand that you love all the stuff that is happening here and so do I, but just wait and see what you feel after we meet each other". I was trying to be very sensible about it. After a year and a half of lots of online dates that start out like a dream but fall apart when you actually share 3-dimensional human space with a person, I didn't want anyone's hopes to be raised and then dashed. But one day it just happened.

I used to be the kind of person who fretted about the meaning of everything and what was love and how do you know and when can you say it and what if it's not returned and oh my god everything has to be perfect. But when Erik said it (when he did say it, he immediately followed it with "$#@t! I mean...uh"), I surprised myself by enjoying it and yet also not becoming catatonic with the expectation of what comes next. It felt really natural and right. I was like, heck yeah he loves me, of course, I am quite lovable. And you know, I think I love him too. I love the him that I know right now, and I love talking to him and being with him like this. This is pretty great. I think I'll just go with that, and re-evaluate if the greatness level changes. So I laughed and said it back and told him all that, and wasn't worried about making sure it was perfect and unchanging and full of deep meaningful meaning, like I usually would. Those moments of deep meaningful meaning definitely came later, in their own time.

Our first "I love you" wasn't like a fireworks display, and I liked that. It was just comfy. It helped me chill out and honestly I think if I had gone into this situation with my usual mindset then I would not have enjoyed it half as much and it probably wouldn't have even happened. So for me, being foolish paid off for once. <3

[mimibee]

After 4 days!

[Cami213]

My bf and I met while we both were vacationing. We met on a yacht party and was inseparable that night. We spent the next two days together and when he walked me to my cab to go to the airport he said, "I really do think you could be my soul mate, I love you." I was shocked, scared and afraid of the fact that none of it was real. I cried all the way to the airport and when I got home. We are going strong so far and he tells me , "I love you" every time we speak/skype. I believed him the first time and I love him too. Time is definitely not a good indicator of true love, actions are.

[rache82]

I said it after about two months which is not like me, but we'd been friends for nineteen months, and also, I truly felt it. We have an absolutely amazing connection and our communication and honesty with each other is nothing I've experienced before, even local relationships. He says it now too though he started to a couple of weeks after me I believe, but now we say and mean it all the time - after each call and sometimes during.

[Stacie anderson]

We said we loved each other in about 4 months. We met the same day i was leaving jamaica and ive been back to see him 9 months later. We are sooo in love & dont mind showing each other but at times i feel so sad because i want to kiss & touch him so bad that it hurts.

[Karura]

I don't remember exactly when it happened but it was shortly after we decided to start dating/make it official and he was the first one to do it because I'm from a community when you don't usually share your romantic feelings so openly, so I get embarrassed. Took me longer to say it but he was so happy when I did <3

[Evylania]

He was the first to tell me this after I first visited him as his girlfriend. That's the last thing he told me at the airport before going through security. Was even harder for me to leave after hearing that. Told him I have same feelings a bit later ~

[kannagibhooshan]

it was about 2 weeks of talking...i confessed that i liked him ...he took around 15 days to accept...... so may b 1 month to properly come in a relation ...

[rockin]

We've grown much closer in the few months we've known each other. I told her I liked her a month before we started dating, and she friend zoned me then. Something changed within a month, she's really shy, but she built up the courage to say it before going to sleep. I told her I did too. A week later, we started dating, and when we did, I realized how much I meant to her, and I love her even more now.

[dustinthewind]

My SO and I dont say " I love you" we say "I heart you" which in our weird definition isnt quite "love" so to speak. My SO wrote me this beautiful email last July 2016, wherein he told me he loved me, but then recanted saying he was caught up in the moment. Boy did that one hurt lol. We haven't really said it since that time, other than when he arrived home from a 30 day stay with me in November. I do love him, I must or I wouldn't put up with the crap I put up with just not sure he loves me back at this point, since he has made no effort to come back to visit and us fine just using messenger at this point.