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Four months in...what to buy him for bday?

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    #1

    Four months in...what to buy him for bday?

    So we've been dating for four months now and next visit I'll be there for his birthday. I definitely want to get him something but I don't know what. I don't want it to look like I put TOO MUCH thought into it...Might freak him out. We are exclusively dating. We've not used the relationship handle yet so yeah.

    I was thinking a small bottle of his favourite fragrance, a scented candle (girly but he likes them lol) and maybe some homemade biscuits. I guess that would be about £35. Yet some of my friends said they wouldn't buy something for someone they'd just been dating for four months. Am I thinking a bit OTT?

    It is my birthday the week after that and we are apart. I know he will most likely completely forget but I guess I'm just accepting that.
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    #2
    So you've only been dating four months. It's not liking you're buying him a trip to Tahiti for his birthday. You are doing something thoughtful that's not over the top. There's nothing wrong with that.

    My SO's birthday is Nov 8th and mine is Nov 10th, so we will always celebrate it together. There's nothing wrong with saying to him that you'd like to have joint birthday dinner & cake to celebrate together. That should help him to remember.
    To those who dream, nothing is ever far away.

    ​Distance is to love as wind is to fire. It blows out the little ones and fans the big ones.

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      #3
      Jelly, I don't think what you describe is over the top at all. And the notion of not observing a birthday for someone you've been dating 4 months (whether you've used the official relationship word or not) is pretty mind boggling to me. But then again, I'm a big birthday person. ❤️

      I've been with my SO for almost 7 months and his birthday is today. I posted in another thread about his present - I collected tons of cards and letters from his friends and family and am having one of his best friends give them to him today. It isn't real expensive but it's genuine and I know he will love it.

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        #4
        When my former SO and I started dating, his birthday was only about less than 3 1/2 months after. I got him 4 sets of tickets to see two of his favorite bands (separately) and tried to get a bunch of people together to go out the night of his birthday. Do what you want. He's your SO. Don't let other people tell you that you're doing too much. If that's what you want to do, do it. If you've been dating exclusively for 4 months, I see nothing wrong with what you'd like to do.

        Granted my former SO and I were in an exclusive relationship, and called each other BF/GF, but still. Even when we started talking, and I was going to stay with him for Christmas, I got him a gift card. We started our official relationship 3 days before Christmas (during our visit).

        So again, if you'd like to do something for him for his birthday, no matter how big or small, go for it.

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          #5
          Yeah I'm big on birthdays too, and I normally put LOADS of thought into them, but the guy I'm seeing is quite unmaterialistic, not really into things like that and he also gets freaked out super easily which is why I wanna make sure it has the correct balance of nice but not TOO nice. I don't want him to have to feel like he has to match it on my birthday, because I know he probably won't. However, mentioning a joint dinner or something is a good idea!

          I think I'll stick with what I said then, and a nice card.

          QueenD - I read about your surprise. It was soooo sweet. Hope it went well :-D

          Comment

            #6
            Originally posted by Jelly11 View Post
            Yeah I'm big on birthdays too, and I normally put LOADS of thought into them, but the guy I'm seeing is quite unmaterialistic, not really into things like that and he also gets freaked out super easily which is why I wanna make sure it has the correct balance of nice but not TOO nice. I don't want him to have to feel like he has to match it on my birthday, because I know he probably won't. However, mentioning a joint dinner or something is a good idea!

            I think I'll stick with what I said then, and a nice card.

            QueenD - I read about your surprise. It was soooo sweet. Hope it went well :-D
            Glad you liked it. And make no mistake, I did put a ton of thought into it, just not a ton of money. He is a quality time and words of affirmation dude so I went with that in my planning.

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              #7
              Your idea is totally fine. I have a friend whose boyfriend paid for her $250 tattoo after they'd only been dating for two months tops. THAT was a bit much. Buying your s/o something you know he'd like without breaking the bank is simply being thoughtful and practical. Hopefully he returns the favor.

              I know for my s/o's birthday, I bought him a poop emoji pillow. His birthday is no excuse for me to not give him shit

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                #8
                I think it's closeness that matters more rather than a status or a label. I mean, I'd do something like that for a good friend too if I were there for their birthday~
                Besides, being thoughtful is never over the top~

                Originally posted by Harlequin View Post
                I know for my s/o's birthday, I bought him a poop emoji pillow. His birthday is no excuse for me to not give him shit
                haha, a good one

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                  #9
                  Your present idea sounds like a fab one. I don't think that its too early to buy a gift either and im sure that he will appreciate it


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