My boyfriend and I are 3,000 miles apart. We have been dating for 3 months and he just left to go back to school and I won't see him for about 40 days. This is my first LDR and first relationship. He had a girlfriend for 4 years that ended a year ago and they were long distance for about a year of that. I really miss him and feel lonely and sad without him right now but he doesn't seem very effected by it. He says it's because he's used to it and it'll set in later and he'll feel it more later. I can't help but feeling the disparity between relationship experience very strongly. Is this something to be really concerned about or will it even out?
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LDR's are not easy and I want to lie and say they get easier but they don't. It didn't for me anyway. But you can work around it! Make sure to keep busy. Go out with friends, find hobbies, and make sure to not sit around waiting. It will drive you crazy. Something else you can do, it set countdowns to when you'll see him next. Having something to look forward too always helped me. Also, talk about things you're gonna go when you're together. Make plans!
Communication is key in LDRs. So as long as you guys have that then it should be ok. Good luck!
"True love isn't about being inseparable; it’s about two people being true to each other even when they are separated."
Married April 18th, 2015!!
Distance Closed October 4th, 2015!! -
My SO and I have been together almost 3 years - all of it LDR. I find that the distance has gotten a lot easier over time. At first, you focus more on missing each other, and as time goes on, you get back into the swing of your own life and realize that your relationship and SO are only one aspect of your life. Sometimes it is easier for one partner. They key is to realize that don't love you any less but just handle it differently than you do - after all, they are their own person.To those who dream, nothing is ever far away.
Distance is to love as wind is to fire. It blows out the little ones and fans the big ones.
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LDR's are not for 'the faint of heart'. At the same time. Those who have lived near/with each other, first. Do have a bit of an emotional edge. Than those who have the goal living with their SO.
First Visit: September 2016
Second Visit: January 2017 (Her birthday)
Third Visit: June 2018 (medical conference near her home)
John 3:16For God so loved the world. That he gave his only begotten son. For whosoever believeth in him. Shall not perish but have eternal lifeJohn 4:12I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.Comment
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I'm experiencing something very similar with my LDR. My boyfriend is a few years older than me and has done a long distance one before. So as we have talked about the change we are making at this point (we dated for 3.5 months before he moved recently) it seems like I'm more worried and sad than he is.
Which has caused me to question how he feels about me. If he doesn't seem bothered by the time apart, does it mean he doesn't care??
What I've realized is that guys don't always like talking about what's bothering them. For example, instead of saying he'll miss me when he's leaving and we've got over a month apart, my boyfriend spent the last 20 minutes of our visit talking about Thanksgiving. He's invited me to go on a trip with his family for the holiday. So although I was the one acting sad as I was saying goodbye, he was coping by talking about an amazing time we have coming in our future.
In your relationship, don't be discouraged if you show feelings differently than your SO and don't let your emotions get the best of you.Comment
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