More Time

[nhatvoone]

I have been seeing a therapist and we have identified an underlying issue, that it's all normal, down to the move and more importantly, I am still grieving over my dad. Don't get me wrong, I still have anxiety and separation issues, but they are getting more manageable. Definitely more than how they were before and it's reassuring to know that it's down to the fact that I simply miss him.

One of the things I wanted to discuss with my SO was the fact that I *may* have to stay longer, but I do not want to. It's a thought that I am somewhat ok with but I am terrified of losing my partner, as it means longer time apart (8 more months).

However, when I told him, he accepted, and if anything he wants me to stay a little longer so I can get my fill of my work experience (I've been here 2 months). He will be there for me right at the end.

Honestly, I am debating whether I want to stay for another 8. My original plan was another 4, but he wants me to do this and has confidence in me. It's whether I have confidence in myself as I do NOT want to lose him, in any way, shape or form.

Sometimes this anxiety goes and I feel a burst of love for him, but then I am scared to skype him as I worry the anxiety will come back of me missing him.

Because of my rocky past, I have walls that are just built up but I am trying to work through it.

Does anyone else have this?

[differentcountries]

I think you are right that grief can trigger anxiety in a long distance relationship. I think that is what happens to my SO (who lost his father as a teen, and his sister 6 months before we met). I try to push those walls at times, at other times I let him be.

Distance in itself does not threaten the relationship, but it is more the way you communicate over the distance. In your case the distance is quite long so if you work together you can make a plan for visits.

[UnknownBuddy]

I thought more about this post and I think that to help you with your anxiety and fear you should both practice patience. Studies show that People who put less emphasis on the future might make decisions that expose them and their loved ones to greater risks. I've invested and bet my soul that every morning this coming future my Pop Tart will wake up to my message so she can stretch and let that love resonate throughout her body as she wakes up every morning to make her invincible throughout the day. You both have all eternity together, don't focus on the present so much, be happy