Dealing with a breakup

[MrSmith]

So, I guess I should start with myself, and my ex. Well we got together in may of 2015, we have history from before then but that isn't really relevant. We were both really happy, it was probably the most amazing time of my life, things were pretty perfect.

Until about march this year, my ex is quite a bit younger than I am, and my parents didn't like me being with her. They liked it even less when I went to stay with her for a week, which was the first time we met. It was absolutely amazing, but when I got back home, things started going downhill. Long story short, I couldn't stay with my parents so I ended up moving in with my then girlfriend temporarily. (I've never done this before so I'm not sure what to say or how to word things)

Which at first was wonderful until around august, when we started drifting apart a little, we both knew things weren't working like they used to. Around the middle of September we said we'd talk about things and work it out, which she was never interested in doing.

And a few days ago she finally spoke to me, and said that she thought we should break up, and that she liked another guy.

So here we are, she seems happy being with this new guy, and she seems like she's already over me. Yet here I am, feeling awful.

I guess I'm just looking for someone to talk to, or support or advice, I don't really know..

[Honour]

Unfortunately there's a fair share of girls who, around that sort of age group, are extremely shallow and don't really care for the feelings of others. You shouldn't waste any more time on her, since she's made it clear how she feels. I know it sucks big time, but there's not a whole lot more you can do than be kind to yourself, and keep moving forwards.

[hmrambling]

I second not focusing on her. I suggest focusing on yourself. Consider doing an autopsy on the relationship, and you are likely to learn more about yourself and what you want in a relationship from that autopsy. Here's a link.

I did the autopsy, took some time to soak it in, and learned from it.

Focus on yourself.

[MrSmith]

I appreciate the advice. I should also add that I still live her, and won't be able to move out until around December.

And because I don't have many friends or hobbies I don't really get out of the house much, so it's hard to ignore things

[R&R]

Sounds like time for you to get out and do some new things. You are in control of your actions and how you will handle this. Check for meet-ups in your area. Make yourself to get out of the house, even if it's just for a long walk.

[Chris516]

Kick her to the curb(not literally)

It sounds like she did something almost like an (ex)girlfriend of mine. We met between my Junior n' Senior year in high school. It was between her Freshman n' Sophomore year in high school. When we met, her 'true' boyfriend was in the county detention center or whatever is juvenile hall in this county.

Anyway, I was thinking I had met someone that respected me. Boy was I ever wrong. After three weeks, she had her best friend call me at 2am, waking up my dad on a school night. Telling me her 'true' boyfriend had just been released. I told her best friend, I wanted to hear it from my 'girlfriend' and no one else. My 'girlfriend' did admit it in the background since she never got on the phone. In those three weeks, I took her to several concerts and out to dinner a couple of times. But when we just 'hung out', she liked making prank phone calls for fun. I was turned off by this, but never said anything.

A couple years later, I happen to run into her mother at a local metro station. I asked my ex's mother how her daughter was doing. The first thing out of the mother's mouth, was that her daughter had dropped out of school, only weeks into her Sophomore year.

While she wasn't necessarily from 'the wrong side of the tracks'. My parents' despite their divorce when I was 3yrs.-old, were still far better off than her parents'. I had noticed that, the couple times I visited her father's apartment where she was living at the time.

I haven't had any contact with my ex in thirty years. This year she would be 45, if she is still alive.

Indirectly, I am glad it didn't last.