Looking for advices

[Dutch Gouda]

I recently met a girl (about two months ago) with whom I get along really well. We're now in a relationship since a month and a half and living the dream, we both found a person that suits us perfectly, but, because there's a but obviously, she is leaving the continent for a year to study abroad. Since we both are pretty young (18yo), and the distance that'll separate us enormous, we'll be able to see each other only once in the middle of her year there, meaning that we'll be apart for 6 months, twice, with a one or two week(s) reunification. We'll have to struggle our way with 6 hours of difference due to time zones, studies and family problems, among other obstacles. We really want to go through this year together and live happily ever after (hopefully thanks to your advices), so yeah, we'll take any advice there is to stick together thanks for reading and replying !

[Honour]

Persevere. Compared to some people, 6 months is absolutely nothing. It'll fly by if you keep busy and don't dwell on it.

[Harlequin]

I disagree with the mindset of comparing your struggle to others, because I find it's ineffective, and often times leads to more problems. You end up beating yourself up because "others have it worse", when your feelings are still valid, your difficulties are still real, and they're YOUR difficulties. They're not suddenly going to hurt less or go away because someone else is going through something different than you. It's a stupid game where no one wins.
6 months probably isn't going to fly by. It will in spurts, sure, but there will be times where it feels like there's no end in sight. The good news is that the distance is temporary, and as it stands right now, there is an end in sight. That's what you want to keep in the back of your mind, and remind yourself of it when times get rough. You're also going to want to make sure you immerse yourselves in your own individual lives, because the more active you are, the less time you have to really dwell on the loneliness. Try to schedule skype dates or movie dates or something when you can. My husband and I use a website called "rabb.it", which is a streaming platform. You get your own little chatroom, and you can watch whatever you want together. It's free, it's easy, and it's definitely one of my go to's. It's a lot easier than trying to sync things over skype. Also, send care packages or letters to each other. There's a lot of comfort to be found in physical objects from your loved ones, and letters can be super personal. Communication is also going to be THE MOST important thing during your time long distance. Communication is pretty much all you're going to have, so make sure you communicate effectively with each other.

Overall, your situation is absolutely doable if you go into it with the right mindset. If you both keep your thoughts strong and positive, make efforts to keep the relationship going, and communicate 100% openly, you'll be okay.

[erwin1973]

Hi fellow Dutchman.

I agree with Harlequin that when you 'struggle' your way through it, it's a wrong mindset. Think positive, that's 50% of it, if not more. My lady and I have a 6 hour time difference, too. We're together for close to 11 months now and won't be seeing each other for another 14. That means we'll be dating for over 2 years before we first meet! How about that...

6 hour time difference is not too bad, we make it work, too. Let her settle in, be there for her, and try to find a time that works for you both to chat / cam whatever. I don't know if she's travelling east or west (I assume she's going to the States...) so that means you're up front in time. Again, there are many ways to make it work. Just stay positive!

Ik wens jullie veel succes!