I don't know what to do anymore

[gracelunaaa]

I love my boyfriend to death honestly. We've been together for a year and almost four months. But sometimes I feel helpless and just stressed not being able to talk to him about any of my problems. I'm just your ordinary teenager with anxiety/depression/having a mind influenced with constant over thinking that ends up ruining my whole day and to make it worst, I have to keep it to myself so he wouldn't think that I'm more "crazy." He's one of those popular guys that's friends with everyone, goes to the gym every day, hangs with his friends every day and doesn't know half the things I struggle with every day.

I'm not one of the popular nor am I the one that gets bullied. I'm just known I guess; I have tried talking to him before but my responses are "you'll move out grace everything is fine" "oh its okay" "yea" and that makes me feel like an entire fool and makes me want to cry because it makes me come to the realization that him and the rest of my family/friends don't care.

On my birthday last month "29th" I was having a good day so far during my classes and when I came back home everything was a mess and I ended up crying while blowing out my candles (My mother took pictures of me crying and not showing the slightest care of the world while my dad was gone. The reason why was because I was heavily arguing with them (many family problems which would need a whole story sometime later in the future. I went into my room and told him about everything and once again he made me feel like an idiot. He asked to call me and I said yes. During this half an hour phone call, he only sang and kept telling me he wanted to make me feel better involving my bed and body. My voice was breaking, tears streaming down my eyes and for once all I wanted was to talk to him but instead I had to hang up and pretend I was going to sleep and I cried my self to sleep, listening to music and that was really one of the worst days I have had in my life. This is just one of the examples.

This was a month ago but honestly I still can't find myself to forgive him. Am I dragging this? Everything is blurry now. Now all he does is send me videos of him in the gym, or make me listen to five songs every day and it bothers me because I can't talk to him. I don't get mad or anything, it's just stressing since i have to talk to my friend now about all my problems and yet A. (boyfriend) doesn't seem to care either.

I'm not the best girlfriend I know, I try though, I really try and show it but sometimes I find myself putting in all the effort and all he does is just put my last name on a picture or give me a lot of hearts in his good morning/goodnight messages. That's it really. I tell myself so many times that I can't break up with him because I won't be able to find anyone better or not wanting to throw the amount of time we've been together to the trash.

Am I being too dramatic or? I'm not sure anymore, I need some advice please. Because everyone around me calls me dumb about still being with him and that phrase "Long distance relationships never last." I do listen to his rare problems yes, I do talk to him or listen to him fully about his day and everything, it's just difficult to even understand my own relationship because of the lack of care and love, and the increasing feeling of loneliness.

Should I stay with him and try to talk more with him? Or just move on?

[TJ-LJ]

I don't think you're being dramatic. You are both so young, and there are a lot of teenagers who have deep emotions and deep thinking, but then others who are immature and care more about being popular/social and all those less "meaningful" things. They'll grow up, like we all do, but for now that's how they are. And it's not necessarily a bad thing, as we all go through that phase, it's part of growing up. I think your boyfriend just seems to be more of the type who does care more about being the popular guy and living up to that status, and maybe either can't or doesn't want to do or talk about anything more in-depth. Whereas you seem to be the one who does want to share emotions and thoughts. Unfortunately, he's not listening, and is not reciprocating. And it sucks not having support from your partner, no matter what age we are. I'd suggest to try again in talking to him about it, but if he is completely disinterested and unsupportive, maybe then you should consider if the relationship is the right thing at the moment. Ultimately, the decision is yours, based on how you feel and what you think is best for yourself.

[Redheart14]

Some people deal with people being sad by trying to make them happy and not talking about the issue. Maybe he thinks that talking about it will make you cry more and he's trying to make you stop crying by not talking about it and trying to take your mind off of it. Sometimes guys just want to fix things, not everything needs to be fixed and sometimes just venting is enough. Why not try saying- I don't need you to fix this, I just need you to listen as I vent. Maybe that'd work.

[erwin1973]

Some people deal with people being sad by trying to make them happy and not talking about the issue. Maybe he thinks that talking about it will make you cry more and he's trying to make you stop crying by not talking about it and trying to take your mind off of it. Sometimes guys just want to fix things, not everything needs to be fixed and sometimes just venting is enough. Why not try saying- I don't need you to fix this, I just need you to listen as I vent. Maybe that'd work.

For me and my lady, that works perfectly. Just being understanding towards eacht other. It's difficult from almost 7,000 miles to fix each others problems, but already having some to listen is great. I would suggest you try that.