Pre Meet Issues.

[Kerry92]

Hello, firstly thank you for reading my post. So here goes......

Me and my boyfriend have yet to meet but we will be for the first time in less than 2 weeks and I can honestly say it couldn't have come quick enough. Recently I have been struggling with random bouts of mixed emotions, like questioning my feelings for him and constanly questioning whether I love him or not and its been hell.

My boyfriend is the most amazing guy I have ever met in my life he is understanding, sweet, caring and is always my rock when I need support. He has never given me any reason to doubt his intentions or feelings yet I believe because we have never been physical these thoughts and doubts roam free and cause me grief and pain (and I dont mean sex I just mean the small things like hand holding, hugging or just being in each others company)this is why bridging the distance is hardest for me as i fear if these thoughts continue i will loose the one i love to my own demons.

I have been given advice saying that this is normal to questions ones feeling in an LDR and that when we meet things may change once we have been together in person. I do hope this is the case as I do love my boyfriend very much and I cant imagine my life without him.

So I would like to ask if anyone else has been through or is going through what I am? And if so would they be willing to share any experience or tips on how they dealt with or are still dealing with it?
Any feedback would be most appriciated.
Thank you again for reading my ravings.

[autumn1790]

It's unfortunately quite normal...almost everyone gets stressed out in the time leading up to their meetings. My SO and I argued so much, I wondered whether going was even worth it. But, you have to push aside the doubts and focus on the positives (corny, I know). He hasn't given you any reason to doubt...focus on that. Realize that right now, your emotions (and quite possibly hormones) are going to be all over the place, as will his, so try not to take anything too personally. Busy yourself with life and trip prep. I'm sure you'll have an amazing time!
If you want, look around the forum and read the threads others have posted about their pre-visit nerves/stress. It might help to know you're definitely not alone!

[Kerry92]

Thank you your feedback is most appriciated.

[TJ-LJ]

I went through this stage as well. My SO and I fought a lot before we met. Even leading up to the visit, we fought. Over silly things, things that weren't important, but they brought us down regardless. I also questioned a lot how I felt towards him, if I was feeling attachment/friendship or if it was something more. He always showed his feelings and never doubted how he felt, and never gave me any reasons to not like/love him. But when you haven't physically been with someone, just in their presence, it's hard to to get a real grasp on how you feel. However, if what you feel is real, it'll definitely become more clear to you once you meet and spend time together. I thought I'd meet my SO and not feel any spark at all and he'd go back to his country, and we'd basically become strangers—that's how negative and confused I was. But the complete opposite happened; we've now met twice and he's moving here early 2018. So I would encourage you to try not to listen to all those doubts in your mind, and be patient until the visit. No matter which way it goes, things will be a lot clearer for you during/after you meet your partner. Good luck.

[Kerry92]

Thank you soo much for your feedback. It is a massive relief and help to know that someone has went through what I am going through and have came out of it better off. It was hard to try and explain my situation as I wasn't sure i would be doing it right, but your experience and advice has left me with a new outlook and more hope that my relationship will only grow stronger omce we meet. Thank you so much.