Coping while away

[00dude]

So I'm not not only new to a ldr, but also was in a relationship for most of my adult life. So I'm not only trying to cope with ldr but also how to date in a more mature manner. So the person I'm seeing only lives 2 hrs away so I get to see her most weekends. My problem is that whenever I come home from the weekend or vise versa I'm a very mixed bag of emotions. Sometimes I feel great, everything is perfect, sometimes I feel worried if everything is going to be ok. She is very up front about the way she feels and pulls no punches. So I feel if there was anything wrong or she didn't want to see me again she would just say so. But my insecurities make me feel like there may always be that possibility, although she does nothing to make me feel this way. We have only been seeing each other for a couple of months so I dont want to rush into this too hard or act to clingy. I envy everything about her, her lifestyle, her approach to work and life in general. She is a successful business woman and is able to go on trips with friends and family very often and it makes me feel like I'm being left behind, even though I know she has had this life before I meant her. I want to be cool and not let this bother me which means communicating these feelings don't seem like a good idea. Cause I genuinely want to let her be herself and still do her own thing. So bottom line is how do I cope with being away from her and being comfortable letting her live her jet set life style? Communicating these issues at such a early stage of dating doesn't seem like a good idea right now, like I said I don't want to come off as clingy. Also I feel my insecurities all lie in the bedroom. I'm no rock star in the sack. Most times it still feels like both parties are satisfied. This last time however I got her to the "verge" twice but wasn't able to last long enough to get her there. And she did say afterward that she was frustrated at me. Which is why ive decided to finally reach out with this post. I wasn't able to talk about this. And she didn't make it feel like it was a big deal that night. But to me it's all I can think about, is this a huge concern or isn't it? I don't know how to process this and don't want to talk about it over the phone. So I have to stew on these feeling until I see her again. She still wrapped her arm around me that night, still got a kiss goodbye in the morning while she was sleeping. I'm having a hard time figuring out this mature dating game. I don't know how mature women act when dating so I can't read how her thoughts and expressions translate to dating in my mid 30's. I havnt dated since I was in my early 20's. It seemed girls are easier to figure out than women. Any insight would help greatly.

[MyRose]

Hey!

I don't know how much help I will be, but I can attempt.

Firstly, welcome to the forum. And I want you to know that being in an LDR can be difficult, and I think you and everyone else willing to stay with someone they love is as brave as it can get.

I am unsure as to what exactly your question is, but I hope I help you out in some areas:

1) Girls (and woman) take longer to get there. It's perfectly natural. And you should not feel ashamed that you finish before she does, that is just as natural as her taking a little while. There are also different ways you can help get her there quicker. Maybe you could try out the "build-a-willy" kit that is sponsored on this websites (It is in the gift ideas section).

2) The situation you are in sounds anxiety ridden, but given how anxious you are of losing her, you seem to really be in love with her. I would discuss the difficulity her traveling does to your emotional state with her, and ask if there is any way you two could help each other with this.

I am sure she has similar emotions to what you are feeling.

I don't feel like I helped much, but I tried.

Best of luck!!!!