What should I do?

[Bambam]

I'm supposed to see my boyfriend tomorrow. We've met before for the first time in october and we decided we'd meet again march 17th.
Well I haven't heard from him since last Sunday.
I've texted him but haven't gotten any replies.
I'm kind of worried he might stand me up? Or something is wrong?
I guess my question is should I wait until a certain time tonight and if he doesn't get ahold of me should I not go? Or should I go anyway and hope he comes to get me at the airport? I just don't want to feel dumb for not going and he get mad at me and I also don't want to look dumb being stood up at the airport. Idk any thoughts?

[Michelle]

That is really odd. Have you tried contacting him in other ways besides texting? Is he active on any social media? Can you message a friend or family member of his? I would also hesitate flying to see someone that has dropped off the face of the earth. This would make me extremely upset. I hope you hear something back today before you get on a plane tomorrow.

[Bambam]

He doesn't have me added on other social media. He claims he "Doesn't use it" but ik he does.
Idk any of his family. The only person I know is his exs sister because we all played the same game together and her and I became friends but she hasn't talked to him in a while. Sometimes we go weeks without texting, but I figured he'd actually reply to me today seems I'm supposed to go see him tomorrow. we've been together a year, it's been kind of rocky and I was hoping this visit would help me decide if I really wanted to be with him or not. I care for him a lot but sometimes I wonder if he really cares for me.
I guess I'll try to call him again later.

[Redheart14]

Hi and welcome,
That is really odd behaviour indeed. Have you tried adding him on social media and seeing if he'll accept your request? Maybe that'll be worth a try. I wouldn't go unless you can comfortably able to navigate your way to his place from in airport in case he doesn't show. Are you able to change your flight departure in case he's not there? Or can you use the ticket another time? I feel for you, please let us know how it goes.

[erwin1973]

Hi and welcome.
That indeed is odd behaviour but it is up to you if you go or not. Do you have a place to stay there, like a hotel or something? Do you have things to do there when you're left alone, just in case?
You could always text him / write him on Social Media / call him (talk to his voicemail if you have to) that if you don't hear from him, you won't show up or something. Do you have a refund on your ticket? How far away are you?
All things to take into consideration and we have little info to form an opinion.
Still, ghosting just before a meeting seems strange to me. I don't like ghosting at all, it makes me very anxious.
Be wise.

[Bambam]

I've added him a few times, but he's never accepted.
He's accepted other people, though. I sometimes look at his "people who follow"
and once he accepts them they go away from the follow list.
I could probably uber to his place, but I don't want it to be awkward if I show up and he didn't want me there.
Sadly I don't think I can use it another time. if needed I'd just buy a new one. I just wish I kind of new what was going on.

[erwin1973]

I think that is strange. So he says he loves you, but he is shutting you out from his personal life, you don't know his family... and he's ghosting you just before a visit...
Sounds like a red flag to me, sorry to say so.

[Lio]

I think you should have prepared a backup plan in the case you're still going. If not, then I'd recommend you not to go, and to try to get a refund on your ticket if possible, as stated above.

Firstly, as it is also stated, it is odd him not to give you any social media, and to ghost you. I think there are things he clearly doesn't want you to know. It is also possible that he doesn't love you, because if he really did, why would he lie about him not being on any social media, and probably on not hiding anything from you ? You also would know about his family, probably his friends, and you don't.

Secondly, when a LDR couple prepares a visit, the couple is involved in its preparation. Not only you or him. It's the both of you. It's clear he's not involved in it, as he's not messaging you and it seems you don't know where you're going to stay - at his place, a hotel ?

I think the wisest thing to do would be not to go. I think it is too risky going there.

[Uschi]

I wouldn't go and visit him, and if he ever responds I would talk about it with him.
Maybe I'm too mean, but I would talk about him helping you with the money you've spent on this vacation....!

[Michelle]

OP, did you ever hear back from him? Did you end up going to see him?

[Bambam]

For anyone who wanted an update

I had made a post about my boyfriend not texting me back when I was supposed to be there the next day. Eventually he messaged me back and so I went to see him. Going there everything was different and it didn't feel the same. It felt like something was wrong. I was supposed to be there for a month but I found out he was cheating on me. I was naughty and while he was sleeping I went through his phone. It took me 3 days to confront him and I had already got a way home. So 6 hours before I left I confronted him. At first we were mad at one another and we sat in silence then we talked and he told me "everything" or more what he wanted to tell me. He said it was only one girl but there were more. He said it was only a one time thing but she told me they had been off and on sexually for a year. We agreed to try and fix things when i left but I'm the only one trying. He ignores certain questions and replies to what he wants. Mainly if him and her are still in contact. Idk why I care so much still and I wish the best for him. I guess today I realized all the things he's telling me are just so he can "keep me wondering" he doesn't care or he'd be trying. He kept saying he wanted a future with me and doesn't want to be with her and how I'm important and he cares but if he did he'd be trying and being truthful instead of lying to me. I feel really stupid that I ignored all the signs in the beginning. We live and we learn I guess.
I just don't know how to let go? How do I move on?
It kills me because we tslked about moving in together and having a life. He kept telling me i was his partner and I wouldn't be there if he didn't see a future with me. It just messes with my head. Should I remove him off facebook and messaging platforms? He added me after i left because I had messaged the girl to see if what he said was true. Idk. Just lost right now. Sorry this was so long.

[Redheart14]

I'm so sorry to hear this! All the best in moving on, you will find someone who treats you how you deserve to be treated. Just remind yourself of what you deserve. Make yourself the priority and give yourself time to heal.

[erwin1973]

I'm sorry to hear this, BamBam, and don't worry, it was not a long message. I guess you needed it off your chest, too.
Best is to move on and that might not be easy. Break all ties and (re)start your own life. Eventually (I know, this sounds dull) you will get over him. Sorry if I don't have any more advice... I think you do best to move on without him.