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    Swapping Timezones

    So heres the thing ... we've been dating for 8 months, spent 24/7 around each other when travelling in South America for the first 4 months then she went to see her mom.
    That put her 3h ahead of me time wise...and it was fine. Wed chat all day, often Skype, wish each other good night, that went on 4 moths. Visited her twice during that time and things only got better and better.
    Despite the distance at that time it didnt seem hard to do this at all.
    Now she moved back to New York town, which is 6h behind me ... and its killing me, i have the feeling everything is falling part.

    Why ? I have no freaking idea. There is no change in the way we talk. When I had a particular bad phase for a day or two after she moved back home she was super supportive.
    but still, the little devil that lives in my head says its all going bad.

    Im wondering if this is just a matter of getting changed to different circumstances or if I miss the level of "control" so to speak that comes from pretty much talking all day and always knowing each others whereabouts.
    Or maybe it's the feeling I have to compete with the entire male population of New York while being halfway around the world.
    She never gave me any reason to distrust her. She tells me when she goes out, tells me when shes coming home...and yet the little devil in my head wont shut up.
    I know I have to work on myself in certain regards, I know where my insecurities are coming from but still dealing with them is an entirely different matter.

    Not sure if theres any actual question in this :-)

    #2
    Originally posted by libertine View Post
    Not sure if theres any actual question in this :-)
    Maybe not... sometimes it's good to get your thoughts out, though. :P

    Perhaps it is just the adjustment to the new situation. Insecurities can rear up at very inconvenient times. Just make sure you're communicating those thoughts to your SO as well so that you guys are on the same page. Best wishes
    Canadian permanent residence APPROVED!
    Closed the Distance: 09/26/2019
    Engaged: 09/26/2020

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      #3
      I didn't have quite the same insecurities you are saying you are experiencing, but I can tell you that when we were long distance a schedule change like what you are talking about did throw off our timing. It's said that an LDR is very dependent on communication, and with your time zone change you guys affected your communications somewhat. I wouldn't feel insecure myself, but I have no doubt that a change to our communications would take awhile to get used to, and to find a system again. I think you guys will just have to go through a short period of time where you develop a system. I didn't feel like I was in competition with the whole Seattle male population, but when we couldn't have our regular communication times it did affect us a little. Her more so then me. Good luck with that, I don't personally think it'll be too bad, but it is a change and in an LDR any change can seem magnified.

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        #4
        Well, after adjusting to it anxiety is gone again and im sorta back to normal...with the emphasis beying on sorta but im getting there.
        on the very bright side of things we had a chat today and im going to see here at the end of july

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          #5
          Originally posted by libertine View Post
          Well, after adjusting to it anxiety is gone again and im sorta back to normal...with the emphasis beying on sorta but im getting there.
          on the very bright side of things we had a chat today and im going to see here at the end of july
          That's great to hear! I'm glad things are working out for you.
          Canadian permanent residence APPROVED!
          Closed the Distance: 09/26/2019
          Engaged: 09/26/2020

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