We broke up.

[Lio]

My SO and I broke up last week, after two years and almost two months, involving four visits.

She can't see any future with me, due to how difficult it is with us finding work in each other's country.
I'm actually looking to get more work hours as either an accompanying pianist or a piano teacher, in Paris or south-eastern part of Île-de-France, while she quit her job as a hairdresser's teacher, which was 60~70 km away from her place, to which she moved after my second visit to her, last November.

I think she could find some job as a hairdresser near Pyramides area or Opéra Garnier area in Paris, but in my case, finding a job as a musician is very difficult in France. It is way more difficult in Korea. I already suggested to teach French in Korea instead, but she refused to hear me mentioning it.

My Korean is not well enough, same goes about her French. I keep trying to learn Korean, as I love her country and wish to come there again.

I will stop going on this forum from now on. I will stay at the Discord server of LFAD as I met very good friends there. It was a pleasure to meet you all.

All the best to all of you.

[Redheart14]

Oh Lio I’m so sorry to hear this! Please don’t feel you have to leave, you’ve been a great asset to the forum as it was nice have a male perspective on things. Please keep in touch. Was the break up out of the blue? Or do you think it was coming for a while? Your blogs of holidays always were so wonderful to read and it looked like things were going well with the two of you. Have you had contact since the breakup?

[autumn1790]

So sorry to hear this Wishing you the very best.

[Lio]

Please don’t feel you have to leave, you’ve been a great asset to the forum as it was nice have a male perspective on things.

I feel I have to leave as I'm not in a relationship anymore. It would be nonsense to help people with their problems, while I haven't been able to save my relationship.

Was the break up out of the blue? Or do you think it was coming for a while?

I was not surprised much, but it still instantly put me very down. I was trying very hard to save it, I made many efforts to keep it going on the right path, but I have the feeling that she slowly gave up, and that some problems started after my last visit, in April.

Your blogs of holidays always were so wonderful to read and it looked like things were going well with the two of you.

I think the problems in our relationship started to take place during our last trip to Japan. She had a very bad time there. I still feel guilty about that as I chose the destination, and as she told me about the problems she could encounter, not long before I went to visit her - the airplane tickets and hotel rooms were already booked for a long time.

Have you had contact since the breakup?

Yes, a little bit. She wants to remain as friends.

[Moon]

I'm really sorry, Lio. As someone who's relationship also didn't work out, I know how you feel. I still check in from time to time, though, hope you decide to do the same. Take care of yourself and allow yourself time to heal, best of luck to you.

[Amaris]

Hey Lio,

I'm so sorry to hear it! And it'll be hard if she still wants to stay friends, like nothing happened. Just take your time with things. And I'm glad to be able to still see you on the Discord server.

*hugs*

[lelyta]

I feel I have to leave as I'm not in a relationship anymore. It would be nonsense to help people with their problems, while I haven't been able to save my relationship.

Aw Lio.. I'm so sorry about what happened... Don't be too hard to yourself... The wisest advice might come from people who failed... Also, my SO is French, even though so far we'd able to manage our relationship... We haven't had some serious talk about moving and closing the distance... Maybe you still can help..

But also, take your time to heal.. It's the most important.

[Lio]

Well well well. I wanted to edit the title of the thread, but it seems it's not possible. (not a big deal)

We were chatting a little bit a few days, then I told her this morning about my feelings. She knows I never wanted to break up. I've told her how I felt after I saw a few pics of us when I was scrolling in my phone's gallery yesterday morning. After having discussed about it, we agreed to get back together.

I actually felt like it was time to accept the break-up when I was writing this thread. But a part of me still refused to accept it, even to realize it. I think I found the right words when we chatted this morning. I'm very happy that we are thinking the same way. Now, I believe the most important part of our relationship will start now, but we decided to keep going and to give a chance to our love. We're certainly far from being perfect, but we have spent 2 years and 2 months together, and it was a beautiful time. The future will tell us whether it was right (or wrong) to continue our relationship and to stop the break-up.

Thank you everyone for your supportive messages, here and on the LFAD Discord Server.

[Redheart14]

That’s great news