Crashing my mind

[Mar939]

Hi,

I'm almost there, its 4 days left.
I cant imagine how it will be serious!

There are days we are doing good but the bad days do count heavier for me.
I have no idea how to react when I'll see him.
When I think about it my heart is racing lol If it is because im excited or nervous, I have no idea

I just can't understand one thing.
Yesterday he called me and asked me if I did hack his Instagram lol
I was pretty confussed and ofcourse I didnt do it, why should i? he said that im suspicious. Im was like what the ...
He didn't believe me. I JUST DONT GET IT. I have never done something wrong to him and he is treating me like I'm always lying and doing him wrong.

After that slippery thing with him and that girl, he told me I'm a liar. The point is.. he did that, not me. STILL its me who did a mistake....

Im really doing something wrong here. Honestly, I want this to end but I need a talk before I can close this book.
Maybe this talk is gonna do good and we give it another change but for me , I dont know if it ever will be better.

Im just crashing my mind over this again and again.

[Redheart14]

4 days left until?

[Mar939]

4 days left until?

Till I will meet him

[Atlantic Crossroads]

Firstly, him never taking the blame for his actions and behaviours is a big red flag.
Secondly, he shouldn't be accusing you of anything.

I myself have been in a relationship with a physically abusive alcoholic. He accused me of cheating on him with a stranger we met down the chip shop, because he heard me laughing and I went off to the toilet alone.
One night we were laying in bed, and I saw him texting something about looking at the stars. I asked what he was doing, and he claimed it was for me! I later discovered that he was in touch with another girl in australia, whose name he had tattooed across his heart!!

It doesn't sound to me like he is any good for you, or anyone else for that matter. Lots of arguing is also a bad sign. You should be able to communicate without it escalating. The odd argument is fine, but it shouldn't be that frequent.
The easiest way to think of it is: Would I treat him the way he treats me? If the answer is no, then you should walk away. It's so easy to overlook things when you are in a relationship.

I've only just realised that my ex was abusive. He may not have been physically aggressive towards me, but I avoided telling him things, because I knew they would send him into a fit of rage. You should always feel able to say what's on your mind, without worrying how they will react to what you say.

[Mar939]

Firstly, him never taking the blame for his actions and behaviours is a big red flag.
Secondly, he shouldn't be accusing you of anything.

I myself have been in a relationship with a physically abusive alcoholic. He accused me of cheating on him with a stranger we met down the chip shop, because he heard me laughing and I went off to the toilet alone.
One night we were laying in bed, and I saw him texting something about looking at the stars. I asked what he was doing, and he claimed it was for me! I later discovered that he was in touch with another girl in australia, whose name he had tattooed across his heart!!

It doesn't sound to me like he is any good for you, or anyone else for that matter. Lots of arguing is also a bad sign. You should be able to communicate without it escalating. The odd argument is fine, but it shouldn't be that frequent.
The easiest way to think of it is: Would I treat him the way he treats me? If the answer is no, then you should walk away. It's so easy to overlook things when you are in a relationship.

I've only just realised that my ex was abusive. He may not have been physically aggressive towards me, but I avoided telling him things, because I knew they would send him into a fit of rage. You should always feel able to say what's on your mind, without worrying how they will react to what you say.

Wow that Tatt. is crazy tho. Your are totally right and to be honest everyone is right about what they think about the situation but still I dont know why I just cant put this in the trash bin. Hope I can make things clear after next month, seriously its slowely breaking me. thank you for the words, you made a good decision