Is it over or am I sabotaging it?

[IneedSupport]

I'll try to make this brief. We've been together 6 months, talking for 8. We're separated by a 3 hour plane ride.
I (female) keep feeling very lonely and insecure in our relationship. He handles the distance better than I do. I have children, he does not.
I don't know if what we're doing is sustainable. He treats me better than any man ever has in my life, but the distance between us causes me so much loneliness and confusion. He has said he will move to me, but we don't have a set time line. And I fear bringing it up because it tends to start an argument. He doesn't like to talk about feelings and emotions like i do. Am I in over my head? Should I just try to go with the flow more? I do have medically diagnosed ptsd and anxiety disorder, I should add. Not to mention severe abandonment issues.
I cried 3 different times the last weekend we were together about our relationship. And it wasted time and caused an argument. I could just use some help and support. Is it unfair to keep bringing it up? How do I let go and not give into the unknown future thoughts and severe loneliness? Or maybe I'm just not cut out for this. It feels like a fake relationship sometimes even though he's my favorite person in the world.

[MsGrim]

At first when my SO and I started our LDR I always had feelings of insecurities and anxiety, only because I was new this type of thing and didn't really know how to handle myself, the distance, or being alone for the most part. It is something that you learn to cope with, but first you need to really ask yourself is it worth it to you, is he worth it? If yes, then I would say to just take it slow and really feel out the relationship before you have serious "closing the distance" talks.

I am not sure on how you feel but I wouldn't take such large steps like moving to a new place with a normal, local relationship. 6-8 months, in my opinion, is a short amount of time to have serious talks such as that, but again, that is totally up to you and your SO. Of course in an LDR there should be a plan set to close the distance eventually, they can't last forever.

Maybe instead of "when are we closing the distance" try a different approach. "Maybe in 3-6 months (or how ever long you feel is comfortable) we can revisit this conversation and talk about it more?" I wouldn't hound him into making a decision right now but definitely let him know its on your mind and your open to whatever he feels is right. Communication is key in all relationships but VERY important in a LDR.

In the meantime, focus on building a stronger bond between you, keep learning things about each other and eventually whats meant to happen, will happen. If you both feel this relationship is right, then its definitely not fake! Good luck to the both of you!

[IneedSupport]

Thank you for the reply. I feel much better after reading your post!!

[TaraMarie]

Oh...I know that feeling. Loneliness is hard. I was telling my husband this mor ing that I am so happy I don't have to be lonely anymore. He handled the distance way better than I did. If it wasn't for him I would have given up so many times. I also had children and he had to move to me. It took years, but was worth it. just enjoy what you have and don't waste any time. Time is precious.