Refusing to communicate and shutting me out

[Hazelwoa]

My partner has basically told me that he is going to be busy and that i should get used to it. I recently moved to Denver for a position I could not turn down He lives in Dallas which is an hour flight and I’m already planning to go twice this month.

One minute he says he is willing to put in the work and the next he says he is over it and nevermind, that i shouldn’t book anyone flights. I truly love this man. Maybe I’m stupid for still committing to him when all he does is go back n forth. He admits to being insecure so I want to be patient with him.

But here is the thing. I struggle with abandonment and rejection but have come such a long way! I’m not where I used to be but him not answering me, me texting a bunch of times is a huge trigger. I am working on it though in therapy and prayer. What do i do? I truly don’t want to give up on the relationship but I’m dealing with a Virgo man who is filled with emotion but super cold.

Please provide help because it’s hard enough moving to a new city but not having any support and feeling like he is punishing me is even worst. I’m trying to prove him wrong that it can work and that I won’t cheat or leave him but yeah...

[vivid_idea]

Hi Hazel, I’m sorry you are going through this. It doesn’t feel nice when there is a lack of support and understanding. How long have you two been together?

I, too, am with a Virgo man. Lots of feelings there but easier for them to go cold and shut us out than to reveal how vulnerable they feel.

All I can suggest is being completely vulnerable with him, and feel strong enough in yourself that no matter what he says and does, at least you were able to show him how you feel. Also, empathise with him. The move has probably devastated him more than you (or even he) realises. Make sure he knows that you understand it is very hard, but that you want to be positive and hold onto everything that is good. Make him feel like he is the man for you and this is something you are both strong enough to handle together. It is a challenge, not a disaster.

Good luck!