Hi guy's. Looking for some advice. I think I know what advice I'll get but here goes. I met a lovely lady after the passing of my long time wife (30 years).
We had been together for a year when I received a job offer in another city, around 1000 kns away. We were madly in love and decided that I should take it. She would follow me down in 4/5 months after the sale of her house. She still lived there with two of her four kids. The kids were about to move out. They are 21 and almost 20 (She was planning on selling it anyway).
I moved in late May 2018 and she was to follow in October 2018. In September 2018 she said to me that the housing market wasn't strong enough to sell (which it wasn't) and that she was going to look at other family members to rent it. In the meantime, she would be getting a new work contract in February 2019 so staying for that was what she was going to do and would move then. So we continued the fortnightly travel. She would juggle work and life commitments as would I. This was and still is a very loving relationship. Of course come February, the new work contract was in, but the housing market had picked up again so the decision was now made again to sell. With her still living in it she would go hard at it and get it up for sale by March then move to be with me by Easter or May at the latest. All valid reasons for the change of mind right ? We have been doing some traveling together too so what happened next is interesting. Cheap holidays to an overseas destination became available so a holiday for August 2019 was organized. Unfortunately the house needed a number of things fixing so it was decided to just hold off till after Easter which then turned into May/June. The fourth 100 % I'm moving promise was now in the book. As it was only a short while till our August holiday, she felt that it was going to be to difficult to sell before leaving as she didn't want the sale of the house to happen while we were away and in the meantime her 20 year old requested one last Christmas in the house. A request that was granted. So it was decided once and for all, her ex husband would now move back in to allow the asset of the house to be kept, and she would quite simply just move out. February 2020 was the date. March at the latest would aee her absolutely 100% move to me. Of course the fifth promise wasn't to be. Her eldest daughter, almost 23, became pregnant and upon hearing that her mother was about to move, informed her that she couldn't move now as she couldn't go through with the pregnancy and birth without her mum by her side. She had high stress levels throughout the first pregnancy so needed her mum. So now the decision was made. She would move out of the house, her ex husband would move in as shed promised him, and she would now sign a six month lease which would take in a June birth along with a period of time to make sure her daughter is ok. This would likely be around September/October. Once again, all extremely valid reasons right ? I have not been quiet about all the promises, however, now due to my attempts to point out that she has changed her mind five times, she has told me that she is not giving me the date for a sixth promised move as she believes this is where she has gone wrong in the past !! I love this woman and she loves me but I am now 54, and want that second chance at love and a full time relationship. After 2 years of a ldr, and now another 6 months added to that, I would love everyone's opinions.....
We had been together for a year when I received a job offer in another city, around 1000 kns away. We were madly in love and decided that I should take it. She would follow me down in 4/5 months after the sale of her house. She still lived there with two of her four kids. The kids were about to move out. They are 21 and almost 20 (She was planning on selling it anyway).
I moved in late May 2018 and she was to follow in October 2018. In September 2018 she said to me that the housing market wasn't strong enough to sell (which it wasn't) and that she was going to look at other family members to rent it. In the meantime, she would be getting a new work contract in February 2019 so staying for that was what she was going to do and would move then. So we continued the fortnightly travel. She would juggle work and life commitments as would I. This was and still is a very loving relationship. Of course come February, the new work contract was in, but the housing market had picked up again so the decision was now made again to sell. With her still living in it she would go hard at it and get it up for sale by March then move to be with me by Easter or May at the latest. All valid reasons for the change of mind right ? We have been doing some traveling together too so what happened next is interesting. Cheap holidays to an overseas destination became available so a holiday for August 2019 was organized. Unfortunately the house needed a number of things fixing so it was decided to just hold off till after Easter which then turned into May/June. The fourth 100 % I'm moving promise was now in the book. As it was only a short while till our August holiday, she felt that it was going to be to difficult to sell before leaving as she didn't want the sale of the house to happen while we were away and in the meantime her 20 year old requested one last Christmas in the house. A request that was granted. So it was decided once and for all, her ex husband would now move back in to allow the asset of the house to be kept, and she would quite simply just move out. February 2020 was the date. March at the latest would aee her absolutely 100% move to me. Of course the fifth promise wasn't to be. Her eldest daughter, almost 23, became pregnant and upon hearing that her mother was about to move, informed her that she couldn't move now as she couldn't go through with the pregnancy and birth without her mum by her side. She had high stress levels throughout the first pregnancy so needed her mum. So now the decision was made. She would move out of the house, her ex husband would move in as shed promised him, and she would now sign a six month lease which would take in a June birth along with a period of time to make sure her daughter is ok. This would likely be around September/October. Once again, all extremely valid reasons right ? I have not been quiet about all the promises, however, now due to my attempts to point out that she has changed her mind five times, she has told me that she is not giving me the date for a sixth promised move as she believes this is where she has gone wrong in the past !! I love this woman and she loves me but I am now 54, and want that second chance at love and a full time relationship. After 2 years of a ldr, and now another 6 months added to that, I would love everyone's opinions.....
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