Help With Telling Parents

[SandersFan116]

I've been with my boyfriend for almost a year now, and I don't wanna hide it anymore from my parents. He always tells me to wait, but I feel as if I need to tell them. They think the Internet is evil and corruptible, and everyone on it is a perv. He told his dad btw. Do I listen to my bf or do what I think is right?

[inlovewithaviking]

Hi!

I don't know if any of this helps but I also have a same kind of problem. My parents or especially my mum, thinks people on the Internet are the entirely different race from ones "irl" and I'm quite sick of it.

What I've decided to do is to not tell her and yet get her used to it. For example, I constantly tell her about what we talked about with or without mentioning that it's him. At first she constantly stopped me on the halfway (rude!! xd) but now she looks more relaxed and comfortable hearing it. Or sometimes she literally walks into my room without knocking which leads to her seeing him while we're on video call, without me intending it to happen.

The thing is.. we aren't always responsible for what my parents say or feel about online dating or basically any relationship because even if he was a jerk like they "knew", it's not even your fault cause it's him that was being cocky, not you. And if it does turn good, it's all up to your parents whether they keep complaining or maybe open up and be kind.. because he even may be the one to help you out of the bad days when they have no idea how to help you.

You're probably not the only one to go thru this, but I'm sure it's gonna turn alright...
Good luck!

[Atlantic Crossroads]

It's definitely a case of knowing your audience here. You know your parents best, so you'll know how to handle them best. I would start with small things, like the above poster mentioned. There's no need to give them all the details straight off and freak them out.
My mum is not a fan of the internet, and is highly distrustful of meeting people that way too. I'm 33 now, but she was the same when I was your age. My sister actually moved in with a guy she met online when she was 17, and my mum rang the police for advice!
Parents will always worry about their children, so I think the best option is to ease them into the change, and show that you're handling it responsibly. They may not approve, or be happy for you, but they are likely coming from a place of concern.

BTW My mum doesn't know about my SO yet, and we're engaged! But don't follow my example.

[BaconGirl05]

My SO and I were quite young when we met and we developed a relationship shortly after. I don't really remember how I told my parents about it, but I would tell them about my "friend from Australia" as he and I talked. I know at first my mom was really skeptical and worried that I was talking to some old guy online. My SO and I would text and Skype/Facetime a lot. So as our relationship went on, I introduced him to my family if he and I were Facetiming and he did the same with his family. My parents ended up meeting him through that and got to know him as our relationship went on. Then as time passed, I became more open with my parents regarding my relationship with my SO. Eventually, I would just casually say that I'm going to Facetime him and I'd go to my room to talk to him. It became quite normal in my household and they knew that he and I were more than just friends.

My parents got used to him and would even ask questions about him or ask him how he was doing if they saw us on Facetime. It was a two-way street between me and my parents. I was open and honest about things and my feelings towards my SO and in turn, it gave my parents the opportunity to get to know him. Just be honest with your parents. They may be accepting of it or they may not be. It is normal for them to worry, so that might be their first response. As the others have said, ease them into it at first and go from there.

Good luck xx