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LDR breakup because of physical needs

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    LDR breakup because of physical needs

    He broke up with me because he didn't meet his needs which are physical needs aka intimacy... he told me he's been sexually frustrated and for that reason he broke up with me because of us being distant ( we're only 3hrs away from eachother ) and never met... he's told me several times he'll come and visit me, but he never did he always uses his kids as an excuse for ex: "My kids are always with me" like if his wife can't take care of them ( they're separated, 4 kids, youngest is 5yrs old) also he has said that the car he has right now isn't reliable enough for a far drive... (He's 32 and I'm 23) I have no kids, I don't know how to drive, I don't have a job. I've thought of ways to go see him as far as taking a bus, but I asked my mom for her opinion and she's told me that I was crazy for going to meet him and if he really loved me he would come see me.
    When he broke up with me he told me he still wanted to be friends with me and I wasn't okay with it and he got mad that I didn't want to, atleast not at the moment because he broke up with me and how can someone be friends with an ex they still have feelings with right? So, I changed my mind and I'm still friends with him... we talk everyday, all day, since we met in an online game and usually bond like that...we do some flirting around but not all the time and sometimes I ask myself if he still has feelings for me...or why does he still want to be friends with me and flirt with me when he told me he can't do LDR relationship anymore . And I totally understand him and his needs but he made it clear to me that he only wants to get laid, that it's been long and 2 years of having no physical affection/connection with me isn't gonna work so he chose to break up with me. I understand being intimate is important in a relationship, but in my head I think he already went ahead and met his needs with someone else, idk I just might be overthinking because all of a sudden he's nice to me some days and some days we just act like friends. I just don't know whether to cut the friendship off and move on or ask him if he still loves me or what does he want from me..

    #2
    Best of luck moving forward. Long distance isn’t for everyone,
    .

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      #3
      Going to sound awful, but unless you cut the ties its going to make it harder to get over not being in a relationship. I also don't think its fair him getting mad when by all accounts it sounds like he didnt make an effort x


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        #4
        Cut him loose completely and work on healing yourself. He cant have his cake and eat it too.
        ~And ever has it been known that Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation~

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          #5
          "car he has right now isn't reliable enough for a far drive", "separated", "he only wants to get laid"

          Too many red flags. Cut your ties with this fellow because he's bread-crumbing. Why do you want to endure more pain?

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            #6
            Being 23 and him being 32 with four kids is a lot for you to take on, regardless. It could be ok if he was treating you well, but I am afraid he isn't, and you know it already. I know it's really hard but you can't be friends with this man in the hope that he will take you back. He doesn't sound like he has much respect for you.

            I would stop being his friend. Maybe he will realise how much he cares about you and he will change his ways. But if he doesn't, you are far better off without him. All the best!
            "The pain of parting is nothing to the joy of meeting again".
            -Charles Dickens

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