New to long distance - PLEASE HELP

[SuanneE]

Hi,

Okay I am new to long distance and i have a few question which i'm hoping someone can please help me with answers. Let me start off by saying that we are not official yet. I'm from South Africa and he is from San Diego, USA. We met online and we have been messaging each other everyday for the past 3 months and video calling almost every weekend. But i'm confused, he keeps calling "my love" and "babe" and even "my future wife" but yet he hasn't asked me to be his girlfriend. What should i do? should i ask him why does he keep calling me that when he hasn't asked me to make it official? is it safe to ask him that without scaring him away?

He keeps saying he is definitely coming to South Africa this December but again we are not official yet? Am i rushing into this to fast? I need some advise

[OhioJim]

Go ahead and ask him why he calls you that.

The most important thing in a long distance relationship is communication. Clear communication.

You have to make sure that your meaning is clear, as sometimes all you have is words. You do not have the typical face-to-face clues (body language, tone of voice, etc) as in a near-by relationship.

But most important, don't be afraid to tell him exactly how you feel. If it doesn't work out then at least you will know. If it does work out then you will be that much farther ahead when you do get together.

Why don't you tell him that you want to slow down. Don't rush things. Take it slow and enjoy the journey!

[MsGrim]

OhioJim said exactly what I wanted to say! You have to clearly communicate in a LDR or things will just not work out. Always, always, always have open communication.. It makes a huge difference in how a relationship can go.

[Rezie]

The gf/bf conversation gets weirder the older you get. If he is a proper adult he might not think it is necessary. Just ask what is the deal, if you consider each other to be gf/bf and being exclusive. He does not need to be the one to initiate the talk.

That being said. Be careful. 3 month of online convo and "my future wife" talk. It's not necessarily bad but I'd keep my eyes open in case it is indication of something a bit intense