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    Losing interest

    Hello, its 1 year I am in a LDR. We never met due to covid but we decided we will wait until this September when the borders should open. We speak on a daily basis, every 3-4 days we call. Its 1 week I noticed he is colder, he texts less and he didnt ask for a call. I mean, he was still texting every day but just some picture or something not relevant. Lately I feel so crazy and jealous and usually I'm not this kind of a person. I didnt know if this is just my imagination so I decided to back off. I guess i was scared and i just ran away. He texted me 3 days ago and he seemed affectionate, I didnt reply. He texted yesterday and he asked if this is it, if I'm just stopping like this. I replied I need some time away, I need to back off. He said it's fine as long as I am doing well, he said we dont need to talk often but he was scared and worried. Now, have you experienced this in your relationships? How can I become again this girl from the beginning that didnt worry too much? How I know if he still likes me?

    #2
    I think you need to be honest with him. From his perspective, you pulled away from him and he doesn't know why. Try to be as honest as you can. Tell him that you sensed that he was distant from you and it made you feel worried and you were scared that he might be losing interest. That's why you backed off from him. You can say that you are struggling with feelings of insecurity and jealousy. To survive an LDR, you have to be able to be completely honest otherwise things will quickly break down between you. Good luck!
    "The pain of parting is nothing to the joy of meeting again".
    -Charles Dickens

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      #3
      Originally posted by vivid_idea View Post
      To survive an LDR, you have to be able to be completely honest otherwise things will quickly break down between you.


      The three most important things in an LDR are:

      1. Honest and Open Communication
      2. Honest and Open Communication
      3. Honest and Open Communication

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        #4
        I remember a while ago I was thinking the same thing.. My SO is pulling away, he's losing interest, he doesn't love me anymore, etc... I got worried and finally just broke down and asked him what was going on. Stress... that's all it was... He was just stressed. He reassured me that everything was great between us and that he was just working his way through some personal stress.

        I could have saved myself so much worry and frustration if I would have just approached him when I first started feeling that way. Instead, I was too scared of the answer that none of us want. You really do just have to be open with your SO and communicate ALL things. No matter how much it sucks to talk about, you just have to do it.
        ~And ever has it been known that Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation~

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          #5
          I agree with what all the others have said. Communication is very important.
          And also, unfortunately, anxiety is a common feeling for lots of us in LDRs and it can be conflated with tiredness, feeling low generally, missing your SO, eating crap etc... So don't ever jump to conclusions without talking to your SO. There can be so many reasons they are pulling away... I think we've all been through some variant of what you're going through.
          Good luck. Let us know how you go.

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