Long Distance Girlfriend is not decisive.

[notrandom1]

The gist: Male and Female, mid to late 20's and 30's. We’ve started our long-distance relationship 2 months ago -
We spend a lot of time playing online games. In the past week, we’ve spoken about two guys that bug me in one way or another.
And this morning I woke up with a heavy heart and clouded mind. I thought and hoped we closed this matter last night… Should I, How do I drop this? forget this? ?

guy1 who flirts with her while I’m in the same game lobby. I noticed when we play with him, her signs of affection for me disappear.
I’ve expressed that I wish her signs of affection wouldn’t lessen when he enters the lobby. She expressed that she only did that because she thought he wouldn’t like it. I translated it like this…
Affection towards her from guy1 is ok. Affection FOR me in front of him - is not.
In her defense, she says she loves me and would be more expressive next time we play with him.

Then the other guy… A parasite.
guy2 who whispers into her ear of his failed marriage while confessing romantic emotions to her.
He disparages her in game… And she goes back. I’ve expressed my concerns and feel he’s attempting to manipulate her.
My girlfriends solution to my heavy mind and heart is… well… She’ll “distance” herself from him.
In my minds eye I see myself in a similar situation… her concern expressed as she typed and spoke would not be ignored nor would I wait aforementioned concerns to fester.
Cutting ties with individuals that would bring her such discomfort would be easy for me.

Should I wait for her to “slowly and politely" let them fade away?
What can I do to not feel this way?
Be brutal. Really lay it into me… Feel free to judge me.

[vivid_idea]

Hi Notrandom1, welcome to the forum,

Have you and your gf met in person or did you also meet through this online game?

I ask because 2 month is not a very long time to be together and I am wondering if you are like "guy3"? Do you guys talk on the phone and video call each other regularly? Do you spend time outside of the game together?

It sounds like she has some kind of bond with both other guys. If you both want your relationship to continue then she will have to distance her contact and communication with the other two. The fact that she does not want to be openly affectionate towards you within the game, especially when this other guy is around, is a red flag I think. Why would she hide anything unless she cares about what the other guy thinks?

In saying all of this, if you want her to be your exclusive gf then it's important to realise how much time and commitment an online relationship takes. You would likely need to plan to see each other in real life and make a plan for how you can be together. Indefinitely long distance can be very very challenging, even for the most committed and loving couples.

Good luck!