I’ve been in a long distance relationship with a beautiful Filipina who I absolutely adore. This has been going on for almost 6 months. I write her poems every day, send her gifs and constantly text her with messages like I love you and miss you, I wouldn’t say obsessively but it is often especially when I don’t hear anything back for awhile. We talk on video anywhere from 3 to 6 hours every night. I live in the U.S. and she’s in the Philippines, we are on almost opposite time zones. My plan is to eventually come and see her around November or December and spend the holidays there. Even though I’ve had other relationships, this relationship has probably been one of the most emotional I’ve ever had. As for our age I’m 46 and she’s 47, we were born the same year but she’s 8 months older. She’s a teacher and works with special education students. She’s also a widow. Her husband passed way back in 2012.
I’m completely in love but I have to admit I’m also not happy. It feels like she’s pulling away from me, messages from her have become less and less. She always used to send a long good morning message to me in response to my poem, now it takes her 3 to 4 hours to reply and the reply is very short now. And the I love yous have also stopped or at least it isn’t as frequent, which I admit hurts my feelings. Like I said this has been one of the most emotional relationships I’ve ever had and I would like to believe she is the one, that one day we could even get married. However it’s also causing me lots of anxiety, feeling ignored, and losing sleep, constantly worrying about her and her leaving. I do trust that she’s not talking to someone else, at least I hope so. The truth is I feel I’m being taken for granted and that my efforts are not appreciated. She used to keep me updated about her day, what she was doing, now the entire day goes by and I don’t hear a word from her until maybe 2 in the morning sometimes later. It seems it’s getting worse and worse as time goes on. And I fear the relationship could be coming to an end. Sometimes I mirror her actions and don’t respond right away to her messages and then she will act more affectionate to me. It’s like when she suspects I’m going to leave her; she reels me back in, and then proceeds to ignore me again.
Overall my feelings are constantly being hurt. I keep wondering if I’m in a physical relationship with her, is she going to turn out to be a very cold women and I’ll end up in an abusive marriage? Another thing it’s going to cost a lot of money to go see her, is it really going to be worth it if this behavior from her continues? Something is very wrong and I don’t know what to do to fix things. I have sent her gifts, flowers, and cards, when we talk on video I can see the teddy bears and cards next to her bed. But like I said it seems she doesn’t have the same interest she had before. Part of me wishes I had never started this and maybe I should just end the relationship however I’m also scared of hurting her. I admit I’ve also made some mistakes. I’m thinking about continuing this for another month or two and see if things improve but honestly I’m tired of feeling hurt all the time. I really do love her and don't want to end this but what do you do when you're not being loved back and appreciated.
I’m completely in love but I have to admit I’m also not happy. It feels like she’s pulling away from me, messages from her have become less and less. She always used to send a long good morning message to me in response to my poem, now it takes her 3 to 4 hours to reply and the reply is very short now. And the I love yous have also stopped or at least it isn’t as frequent, which I admit hurts my feelings. Like I said this has been one of the most emotional relationships I’ve ever had and I would like to believe she is the one, that one day we could even get married. However it’s also causing me lots of anxiety, feeling ignored, and losing sleep, constantly worrying about her and her leaving. I do trust that she’s not talking to someone else, at least I hope so. The truth is I feel I’m being taken for granted and that my efforts are not appreciated. She used to keep me updated about her day, what she was doing, now the entire day goes by and I don’t hear a word from her until maybe 2 in the morning sometimes later. It seems it’s getting worse and worse as time goes on. And I fear the relationship could be coming to an end. Sometimes I mirror her actions and don’t respond right away to her messages and then she will act more affectionate to me. It’s like when she suspects I’m going to leave her; she reels me back in, and then proceeds to ignore me again.
Overall my feelings are constantly being hurt. I keep wondering if I’m in a physical relationship with her, is she going to turn out to be a very cold women and I’ll end up in an abusive marriage? Another thing it’s going to cost a lot of money to go see her, is it really going to be worth it if this behavior from her continues? Something is very wrong and I don’t know what to do to fix things. I have sent her gifts, flowers, and cards, when we talk on video I can see the teddy bears and cards next to her bed. But like I said it seems she doesn’t have the same interest she had before. Part of me wishes I had never started this and maybe I should just end the relationship however I’m also scared of hurting her. I admit I’ve also made some mistakes. I’m thinking about continuing this for another month or two and see if things improve but honestly I’m tired of feeling hurt all the time. I really do love her and don't want to end this but what do you do when you're not being loved back and appreciated.
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