Hello People!
This is my first time posting...
I am currently in a LDR for 9 months.
I am a Malaysian Chinese while my Bf is an Arabian. Our story began with him coming over to Malaysia to complete his degree. We met in the university and our relationship started in 2017, so we have been dating for almost 4 years. Throughout the relationship as usual there were ups and downs. This was all due to differences in culture and religious beliefs. We both had overcame a lot of obstacles together although I did brought up a few times that I wanted to end this relationship but he has always been so sure of his love for me and that everything would be alright as long as we were together. Moving forward to last August, due to pandemic he returned back to his home country and eventually graduated online. From the beginning of the relationship I had already accepted the fact that LDR would happen as he does not intend to stay in Malaysia. Our relationship was stable throughout the whole LDR but doubts started kicking in recently. I am the type of person who doesn't think about the future but rather appreciate what I have in the moment. So yea, other than accepting that LDR would happen i really didn't want to discuss much about the future as no one knows what would actually happen and I definitely do not want an argument to start from that topic. However, as I grew older or maturing, whatever you call it, I started thinking about my future. I talked to my bf regarding our future but yet there is no conclusion from our discussion. He plan to marry me but i am not so sure if that would happen or whether deep down I would really wanna marry him. We both did agreed that we want to marry between the age of 28-32 which is like 6 to 10 years later. For now, we just want to focus on ourselves and what we wanna achieve before getting marry and just supporting each other throughout the whole process. Although he graduated, he is planning to take his Master Degree in Canada soon. So basically, we can't meet due to this pandemic and in the future we can't meet because he is in Canada. He did promise me that he would visit me as soon as possible when Malaysia's border is open. But who the hell knows when this pandemic would end an that we will eventually meet. FYI, I am a buddhist and my bf is a muslim.
These are my thoughts and concerns regarding our future:
1. His mother wants me to convert to Islam if we were to get marry in the future. My parents are totally fine with me converting. I myself aren't sure if I would really want to. I feel that it doesn't make sense if i am converting just for the sake of marriage and not because of the love that i have for that religion. So yea, I would try to know more about the religion to see if i would eventually convert not for the sake of the marriage but because I genuinely wants to. Here comes the question, what if in the future I don't think the religion is what i want to practice for the rest of my life?? We won't be able to marry??
2. I am studying law in Malaysia, if I were to move to another country for the sake of us, it would be super hard for me to secure a job elsewhere as I am only practicing Malaysia's law. This would meant my degree was for nothing, my parents paid so much for my education and yet I can't make them proud.
3. I am the eldest child in my family. Usually, in an asian family, the eldest bears all the responsibility of taking care of their parents and just supporting our parents in any way. So I would want to stay in the same country as my parents just so i can take good care of them.
Whoever is reading this, please tell me your thoughts if I should end this relationship based on the concerns that I have listed above. Is it worth giving it a try to see where the relationship would take us to or to end it now?
This is my first time posting...
I am currently in a LDR for 9 months.
I am a Malaysian Chinese while my Bf is an Arabian. Our story began with him coming over to Malaysia to complete his degree. We met in the university and our relationship started in 2017, so we have been dating for almost 4 years. Throughout the relationship as usual there were ups and downs. This was all due to differences in culture and religious beliefs. We both had overcame a lot of obstacles together although I did brought up a few times that I wanted to end this relationship but he has always been so sure of his love for me and that everything would be alright as long as we were together. Moving forward to last August, due to pandemic he returned back to his home country and eventually graduated online. From the beginning of the relationship I had already accepted the fact that LDR would happen as he does not intend to stay in Malaysia. Our relationship was stable throughout the whole LDR but doubts started kicking in recently. I am the type of person who doesn't think about the future but rather appreciate what I have in the moment. So yea, other than accepting that LDR would happen i really didn't want to discuss much about the future as no one knows what would actually happen and I definitely do not want an argument to start from that topic. However, as I grew older or maturing, whatever you call it, I started thinking about my future. I talked to my bf regarding our future but yet there is no conclusion from our discussion. He plan to marry me but i am not so sure if that would happen or whether deep down I would really wanna marry him. We both did agreed that we want to marry between the age of 28-32 which is like 6 to 10 years later. For now, we just want to focus on ourselves and what we wanna achieve before getting marry and just supporting each other throughout the whole process. Although he graduated, he is planning to take his Master Degree in Canada soon. So basically, we can't meet due to this pandemic and in the future we can't meet because he is in Canada. He did promise me that he would visit me as soon as possible when Malaysia's border is open. But who the hell knows when this pandemic would end an that we will eventually meet. FYI, I am a buddhist and my bf is a muslim.
These are my thoughts and concerns regarding our future:
1. His mother wants me to convert to Islam if we were to get marry in the future. My parents are totally fine with me converting. I myself aren't sure if I would really want to. I feel that it doesn't make sense if i am converting just for the sake of marriage and not because of the love that i have for that religion. So yea, I would try to know more about the religion to see if i would eventually convert not for the sake of the marriage but because I genuinely wants to. Here comes the question, what if in the future I don't think the religion is what i want to practice for the rest of my life?? We won't be able to marry??
2. I am studying law in Malaysia, if I were to move to another country for the sake of us, it would be super hard for me to secure a job elsewhere as I am only practicing Malaysia's law. This would meant my degree was for nothing, my parents paid so much for my education and yet I can't make them proud.
3. I am the eldest child in my family. Usually, in an asian family, the eldest bears all the responsibility of taking care of their parents and just supporting our parents in any way. So I would want to stay in the same country as my parents just so i can take good care of them.
Whoever is reading this, please tell me your thoughts if I should end this relationship based on the concerns that I have listed above. Is it worth giving it a try to see where the relationship would take us to or to end it now?
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