We are about to close the distance

[Nesqua]

11 days and I'm moving to be with my partner, I've got all sorts of emotions running through my head!

I'm leaving behind my adult children and everything I know. On one hand I'm so excited that we'll be together, but on the other I'm feeling mother's guilt 😳

Anyone been here, and how do I let myself think about myself for a change?

[Jen72]

Good luck , thats wonderful news . No need to feel guilty we all desserve love ❤️

[vivid_idea]

That’s so so exciting. Yay! So happy for you! I am a mother too, and so I understand the “mother’s guilt” well. Something that really helped me was to realise that we are always modelling happiness to our children. Self-sacrificing happiness, as noble as it feels as a mother, does not always model personal happiness to our children.

Our children also need to see us sometimes “selfishly” seize our own happiness and fight for our lives as individuals, not just mothers. It’s a healthy lesson for your children to learn because you would never wish for them to always sacrifice their happiness for others in their future either. You said they are adults now, and so they are most likely busy with their own lives anyway. You have the internet and we all know how you can nurture a relationship via distance.

Try reversing the roles, if you were an adult child and you saw that your mother had a chance at love and happiness, would you want her to go or would you want her to stay simply to please you?

I hope this helps a little. The mother guilt can be so so strong, I know.

[Nesqua]

That’s so so exciting. Yay! So happy for you! I am a mother too, and so I understand the “mother’s guilt” well. Something that really helped me was to realise that we are always modelling happiness to our children. Self-sacrificing happiness, as noble as it feels as a mother, does not always model personal happiness to our children.

Our children also need to see us sometimes “selfishly” seize our own happiness and fight for our lives as individuals, not just mothers. It’s a healthy lesson for your children to learn because you would never wish for them to always sacrifice their happiness for others in their future either. You said they are adults now, and so they are most likely busy with their own lives anyway. You have the internet and we all know how you can nurture a relationship via distance.

Try reversing the roles, if you were an adult child and you saw that your mother had a chance at love and happiness, would you want her to go or would you want her to stay simply to please you?

I hope this helps a little. The mother guilt can be so so strong, I know.

Thank you, it helped a lot.

[Rezie]

You've raised your kids to be wonderful adults and now you are showing them a great example of taking care of yourself!