first time in LDR and dont know what to do...

[lilxcutie53]

So my bf and I have been together for a year. We went to the same college and stuff, saw each other everyday, etc. The first few months were really rough. He was really distant, we still hung out everyday, but I felt like he wanted to see me when he wanted ( i.e..he would call me at like 7 which would be the first time we talked that day to hang out) like a month into us dating he cheated on me..this girl made a move on him at the bar and he didn't stop it. I forgave him, but was distant for a little when I found out and made it clear that bc he cheated on me, it would give me a right to do the same (i would never cheat, i just wanted him to freak out).

Anyways, after that things got really good. So I graduated from college and he is still down at school finishing his last semester. I am away from home taking on this big internship so we are like 15 hrs apart from one another so that is why we are in a LDR right now. His first relationship was an LDR, but he said that he thought he ruined it because sometimes he would freak out if his then gf wouldn't answer the phone. He said he opened to much up to her and what not and she ended up cheating on him. So I take it that he is afraid to be vulnerable and doesnt want to be overbearing

We've been in LDR since mid August. Everything has been good, we would talk everyday at night for about an hour. If he was busy with school stuff and couldnt talk he would let me know and i'd have no problem with it. If i was busy and I couldnt talk I would say the same to him. I took a trip down to school at the beg. of September. everything was great! 2 weeks a go tho, we kinda had a little tiff. One friday, I went out with some co-workers here and he told me to give him a call when I got home, so I did at like 1130 when I was home. He didnt answer (he was out with his friends that night too) but I expected that he would call me back the next morning. Well I didnt receive a phone call until 11 that night and at that time I was sleeping..obviously I was upset that he waited so long to call me back so normally I would of answered if I heard it while I was sleeping, but bc I was upset I just told myself Id call in the morning..so the next morning I called him back and no answer...didn;t hear from him all day. So the next day (monday morning) I am on the train going to work and I get a voice mail. and its from my bf. I listen to it and its just him saying that hwe havent talked in a few days and to call him back..no worry in his voice at all. so I decided I would wait awhile to call back. So while I was at work, he FB IMed me and said asked why I didnt call him Friday night. So pretty much..he didnt recieve my phone call...which I am assuming made him mad.

Anyways, now that has happened I decided that I would leave him VMs every time he didnt asnwer to make sure that he knew I called. I know VM and texts always go through so yah. But now...this past friday everything was fine...we talked on the phone, he said he was possibly going out etc. he told me to call him saturday and stuff. so Saturday I texted him and it took him 3 hours to respond back. After I answered him back..I didnt recieve a text. and I havent heard from him since. Now, I dont know what to do. I dont want to call because I am the type of person that won't call someone twice. It makes me really uncomfortable. I feel like since I texted him it should be his responsibility to call me back.
I just dont know what to do..and hes supposed to be visiting me on Thursday. The last time we went a day with out talking was the day after he cheated on me....

[Mio]

I think you should try to contact him again, maybe text or call. But let him know you need to talk. I think you should make a communication plan, if you feel that you are not talking enough, then you should both compromise to a schedule. I hope it works out!

[Andy]

I agree with what Mio said, I'd be trying to get in contact again if I was you. I've never been a fan of the sort of rule where someone doesn't call or text twice in a row because of how it might look like. If you really want to talk to him then try again, but if you can't speak to him then make it perfectly clear that you want/need to talk and he should get in touch with you ASAP. Only then would I leave the ball in his court.

I hope you hear from him soon.

[lilxcutie53]

He texted me yesterday morning saying "Hey babe, hows work? lets talk today?" and I didnt respond until 5 hrs later and acted short and kinda cold. then finally when he called me, I really didn't want to talk to him and tried to get off the phone, but then he asked "what was up my ass?" and I just blew up. Of course he gave me the typically excuses. I was "busy., doing a lot of school work" but at the same time, he was upset that I was mad at him and wanted to talk about it. If your giving me lame excuses that I know aren't true I dont know why he would want to talk about it, but ok.