Anyone else find this LDR thing often makes us act like teenagers?

[Verojoon]

I was never into the relationship drama that so many of my friends seemed to be involved in, in their teenage and young adult times, but sometimes I feel like my relationship with SO is making up for it.

I don't just mean the bad drama, but the good drama too...

I was in a relationship for 12 years before I met him... and I always thought that thought that I was a moody, difficult to handle, but cold person... But though I was difficult to handle, we didn't have much relationship drama... About 3 times in those 12 years, I tried to leave him.. and he caused so much drama that I stayed... the rest of the time I was more indifferent to the relationship than anything...

The past two years have been so different. There is so much passion between us... I feel like a teenager! From the cheesy declarations of love! To the missing each other so bad... to the wanting and craving intimacy soo badly (ha! I thought I had no libido!!) to the drama when we fight!! The break-ups... the coming back to each other crying that we couldn't be apart... Our last break-up that actually lasted more than a couple days during which he never gave up on me and was sooo dramatic... Our tearful good byes at the airport... our texting love notes a million times a day...

I love the intensity... but sometimes it gets a bit wearing... luckily we are communicating better lately and it's taking the edge off a little...

Anyone else feel like they have raging hormones when dealing with the long distance relationship? Is it going to be a let down if we ever manage to close the distance?

[iHeartt]

Oh yes, we feel like complete teenagers!! Its wonderful!! You're only as old as you feel, I always say!!
We see each other about every 2 weeks, and are closing the distance in about 3 months. I don't think it will be a let down for us because we're just naturally playful, passionate, and childish. I'll have to definitely let you know!

[blankita719]

Libido wise - oh yeah. Plus you know being in your 30's means it's prime time!!

Rest of the way not so much. We've known each other for almost 17 years and we've seen each other do a lot of growing and changing. My last relationship was drama, drama, drama and I used to say I didn't think I could live without the highs and lows because the highs were so good. Now, I'm not interested in it. He's a pretty even keeled guy, so we don't even yell at each other. I get upset and he stays completely calm - drives me a little crazy But it's a good feeling to know that he is always constant. And that I'm never not sure of where I stand with him.

[Verojoon]

He's a pretty even keeled guy, so we don't even yell at each other. I get upset and he stays completely calm - drives me a little crazy But it's a good feeling to know that he is always constant. And that I'm never not sure of where I stand with him.

Yeah, I don't think we've yelled at each other ever... Before the drama that broke us up in spring though, I would get upset, he wouldn't talk to me... it was so full of drama!! I had never had so many ups and downs... So far since we decided to give it another go, it has been very good. I have been lacking sleep lately and really not the most pleasant person because of it... and I would say he knows how to handle me.. but no, because he doesn't even give me the impression that my moods are something that needs to be "handled"... He insists on talking when I get upset... so yeah, I guess THAT drama is really just on my side now (and 98% hormonal, I believe... I've been having crazy ovulation lately, with cramps and mood swings and fatigue... like I ddn't have enough with PMS!!)

[arizonamyrie]

Definitely! Not only did I feel like a teenager and have had friends joke about us acting like teens, which I think is partly from just being in love, but I also have noticed that we in LDR's tend to overcompensate for the lack of the physical side of our relationships. Also, our LDR's really become a secret world apart from that around us if we're not careful, which also really makes others think we're acting like teenagers.

My LDR is my first serious relationship. A lot of my family had criticized me for supposedly not dating a lot before my SO, but to be honest, I found that I could tell early on in the relationship if it was going anywhere or not. Many times I'd go on a date, and within the first hour know that it was the first and last date with the guy. My SO was opposite - within a few minutes we could not stop talking and everything just fit together perfectly between us. It's been just over four years now, and we haven't gone a day without talking, even if it's goofy subjects such as favorite childhood heroes or something.

I do notice that being so far apart means that the relationship cannot really exist on a physical level - so my SO and I overcompensate a lot on the communication level. We talk. We talk probably way too much, but we talk a LOT. While it has gotten in the way of socialization outside of the relationship, you see people who date locally do the exact same thing. Plus, it's kind of hard to go to a function with coupled friends when you're standing there alone with your SO so far away and wishing they were there. I think it's the idea of missing the other person so much in a situation where, if he lived locally, he'd be there too. All these people around us are doing what we do with each other, but they have the convenience of having their other halves there with them. Seeing this only reminds you of how much you miss your SO, which makes it hard to enjoy time out with other couples. So, you might not be able to give your SO a little kiss on the cheek, but you can tell him or her how much you love them, and you're force to be expressive about it. That's where it makes it all sound like we're teenagers. I've had coworkers temporarily try to pair me up for these events with another coworker whose SO does not go to these, and our coworkers thought they were being nice, but it was never really successful either, and just really made the situation that much more awkward for myself and my coworker.

As for the actual idea of this secret world of the LDR, I find that my room where I have my computer set up is like a continuation of his office at his house 950 miles away. We'll do anything we normally would do on our own, only often on Skype. Nap, eat, intimacy, etc... are all over the webcam and headset, which only helps you block out the rest of your life without him. Teenagers are in this phase of their lives where it is perfectly normal to create their own individual identity. We in relationships do this too - just when you're both local, you do this in front of others with friends and family as witnesses; they grow along with you. When you're sitting alone communicating with each other without witnesses, the two of you in the couple keep developing and keep becoming a couple independent of witnesses who only see these "teenage" changes in you when you are away from your SO and missing him or her.