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Do you split the cost in half or do you take turns?

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    #16
    We've always tried to split it 50/50. We figure that it takes both of us to see each other, so we should both put in the money...

    Example:
    I'd pay for my bus tickets up to see him, but then while I'm there he'd pay for my meals...

    We just try to compromise so one of us isn't going broke over a trip.


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      #17
      We are pretty much along the same lines as I hear a lot of others saying, I am usually the one making the drive, because my schedule is easier to work around, and while I am there he pays for everything else (meals, entertainment, extras). I usually get a hotel room, because he moved in with his parents before his divorce, and he always offers to split the cost of the room, he makes considerably more than I do, but has a much higher cost of living where he is. I'm not exactly hurting for money either, and have a lot of bonuses coming in pretty much year round, so possibly one day I will take him up on his offer. On his birthday weekend though, I splurged and spoiled him a bit, and wouldn't let him pay for stuff. I wouldn't say its 50/50, but it works, for now.

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        #18
        He bought my plane ticket, I paid for the hotel. I will try to take turns paying for meals when we go to resturaunts and the other times we'll go to the grocery store and I will try to sneak in some money to pay for half. He is such a gentleman that he insists on paying for everything.

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          #19
          We never really discuss it, it just happens naturally... My first trip, he paid for everything, my flight, our lodging, our food, etc. Because there was no way it could happen otherwise, from there on, each of us just naturally pick things up... Normally it breaks down to I pay for my flight he pays for everything (his costs end up double to mine but he makes more money AND has less responsibilities than me) but one visit I had extra money so I picked up more of the bills... I don't know, but we somehow manage to divide things naturally without having to plan for it first. If, however, one of us felt like the relationship was burdening one of us financially more than the other, we would talk. For example I noticed he was always stressed out from being so broke after our visits, so I discussed a plan on how we would make our next visit cheaper. (We got a motel with a kitchen, and bought out own food, and stayed in a lot more.) It was good to know we could work out these financial things and he liked seeing how I was concerned about his financial state and could make a plan for it.
          First met online: June, 2010
          First met in person: August, 2011 (See the story of our first visit)
          Second visit: December, 2011 (Christmas and New Years together!)
          Third visit together: August, 2012
          Fourth visit: December 2012 (Christmas and New Years together!)
          Fifth visit: July 2013 (2 weeks here in Canada)
          Sixth visit: December 2013 (Christmas and New Years together again and I finally met his mother!)
          Next visit: Unknown... for now but coming up ASAP

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            #20
            For my SO's trip here, he's going to pay for the $1,200 fare back and forth, and I'll take care of his hotel accommodation for 8 days. I think it's fair enough for us. I think he'll be the one to pay for all our meals on his trip here though.

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              #21
              Originally posted by Moon View Post
              With us, the person doing the traveling pays their own way, and the other pays the majority of expenses during the visit. We've never actually counted up the actual cost, or tried making it come out to 50/50, we just try to make sure it seems fair enough. My flight tickets have ranged from $460 to almost $1300 for summer travel, so I just go there and he does the rest. I'd like to say and vice versa, but when he's here, he's still pretty insistent on paying for some things.

              If travel is becoming a financial burden for you though, it's time to speak up about it. Start out with a simple "hey, I'm not sure how I can make this trip happen" or something, and let the conversation go from there.
              This, except he's never here, I'm always there. I pay to fly, and he pays for the rest. You should totally talk about it if it's becoming an issue, and I like how Moon set it up.

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                #22
                My ex an I would split it. I would pay for my flight there and he would pay for my flight back. I also visited more bc I had more vacation time then him.
                "You want for myself
                You get me like no one else
                I am beautiful with you

                I am beautiful with you
                Even in the darkest part of me
                I am beautiful with you
                Make it feel the way it's supposed to be
                You're here with me
                Just show me this and I'll believe
                I am beautiful with you"

                -Halestorm

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                  #23
                  We try to take turns. I think that's only fair (even though he has the deeper pockets).

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                    #24
                    I paid for my flight and my SO took care of everything else while I was visiting him. It worked out well for both of us.

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                      #25
                      Honestly, I anticipate always being the one to visit him and I fully expect to pick up the cost. Now if I get there and he offers, I won't decline. But I've always been in the mindset that the one who travels should pay.

                      With my previous SO, we met in the middle and paid our own way there. One of us would pick up the hotel and the other would pick up meals and etc. We never discussed it, it just worked out that way.


                      When we love, it isn't because the person's perfect, it's because we learn to see an imperfect person perfectly.

                      True love does not worry about the distance between, for the heart and soul travels through one's words

                      When two people are meant for each other, no time is too long, no distance is too far, and no one can ever tear them apart.

                      1 universe, 9 planets, 7 continents, 194 countries, 50 states and 10 provinces...and I had the privilege to meet you.

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                        #26
                        Originally posted by Sanja View Post
                        I paid for my flight and my SO took care of everything else while I was visiting him. It worked out well for both of us.
                        That's how we do it as well. The one who travels pays for the flights, and the one who 'hosts' pays for everything else (more or less).

                        Like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. - Steve Jobs

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                          #27
                          I generally pay for the flights and a lot of the local expenses, because of our respective economic situations. My GF pays for what she can though.

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