30+ Meeting his family soon

[Freespirited]

My guy and I have been together for a few years now. He hasn't yet mentioned me to his family, but after he met my entire family at a wedding recently, and it went better than we could have hoped, he's ready to not only tell them, but he wants me to meet them. First of all, I'm divorced (17 year relationship with the ex) in my mid thirties (without children), and 21 years younger than my SO. He's divorced (24 years with his ex wife) and have two children, aged 23 and 22. We decided it was time our families heard about each other and met, so I went first. Personally we do not have any issues at all with our age gap. He believes his entire family will genuinely love me once they get to know me, but he feels his mother may have a hard time at first dealing with the idea that I'm much younger. I plan on being myself and if anyone (his siblings, their spouses, or his kids) want to ask me anything I am certainly open to the truth. Just as he was with my family. So he knows we are 21 years apart but I guess in our years together he's never run the math lol and when he asked me what year I was born he started to laugh and said "oh my, I had graduated high school by two years then, definitely don't tell my brother that." . So my question is, for anyone who has found themselves not only in an LDR, but also in a significant age gap, how do you best make it comfortable with the other loved ones in your SO's life? I'm certainly not into him for the money as we are equally just staying afloat. Thank you! P.s., we are trying to close the distance in the next two years and are sure we were made for each other, it's serious.

[Freespirited]

Forgot to mention, I'm fine with not having any children of my own (I came to grips with that years ago) and he's been fixed for 17 years now. I get along well with all of my nieces and nephews great, which are the same ages as his two children so when we do get married, I don't foresee any problems there. He tells me about his son and daughter all of the time and they sound like awesome young adults. I would be open to friendship with them obviously but in no way would I ever try to be a mother figure to them, they have a good mom. I do however get excited about someday getting to play a grandma role to any of his future grand babies we are a team

[blankita719]

While my SO and I do not have quite the same age gap, he is over 9 years older than I am. Really, we just make it a joke between the two of us. I tease him sometimes about being an old man and reminding him that when he graduated high school I was only 9 years old. But beyond that, neither of our families have ever said anything about the age difference. You are in your 30's, so I feel like that makes it less of an impact, rather than if you were 19 years old and hooking up with a 50 year old man. I wouldn't even think about it being an issue. I would just be myself and if it ever came up in conversation with a family member, I'd point out that it doesn't bother me, so why should it bother them?

[BabyGund]

We are 16 years apart -- he's 56 and I'm 40. Honestly my folks had a bigger issue with him being white than the age difference (I'm African-American). My SO's kids are also early 20s and they're just happy he's in love. I don't think his mom knows because she is dealing with some health issues right now.

I think as long as you put together a united front, you'll be fine.

[Freespirited]

Thank you! I never thought about it that way before but that attitude makes complete sense, "if it doesn't bother us, why does it bother you" mentality. Yes, that puts quite a new spin on things inside my head- appreciate it Best wishes in your relationship!

[Freespirited]

Thank you as we'll, Babygund. You sound the same way I do, as long as he is happy, in love, of age and both parties in the relationship want to be together, I say go for it!! It's a shame some people never will see it our way. Many hugs and well wishes to you and your SO